I have always said, "What you are seeking, is also seeking you!" These are some things I have seen and experienced over the first 50 years of my life. My Dad got to be 91 years of age, I would like to get to one hundred and still be healthy. It is hard to deny something when you see it with your own eyes or feel it when it touches you.

Willie Means Well (But It Don't Work Out Sometimes)

Some Things I Have SeenBy Willie Earl Means

AuthorHouse

Copyright © 2009 Willie Earl Means
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4389-8296-0

Contents

Bessemer, Alabama 2731 Eighth Avenue North......................................................................................................1Weekends Should Last Forever....................................................................................................................4From Outdoor Toilets To Indoor Plumbing.........................................................................................................5What Is Real? (Here's To Reality)...............................................................................................................6Murder At Nine TwentyFourth Avenue..............................................................................................................11You Took My Love From Me (A Thought For Janice, Pay)............................................................................................13Willie Means (My Grief).........................................................................................................................14Intertwined.....................................................................................................................................15Chicago 1703 West Walnut Street.................................................................................................................16Snow For those of you who do not know Chicago always gets some snow 1967........................................................................18Roxanne.........................................................................................................................................20On The Move.....................................................................................................................................21The Man At The Top Of The Stairs................................................................................................................22Journeying......................................................................................................................................241307 South Saint Louis..........................................................................................................................26Lexington (2800 Block) When I die, have no pity Bury me deep in Vice Lord City..................................................................30Lexington 1968-Summer 1970......................................................................................................................31Ouija...........................................................................................................................................34Marshall High School(Track and Field)...........................................................................................................40Out Of The Frying Pan And Into The Fire Summer 1971-Spring 1974 (The Cabrini Green Housing Project)-DeathWalks The Streets-.....................43Joann And I (Our Grief).........................................................................................................................46Death Walks The Cabrini.........................................................................................................................49A Whirlwind Romance (Reform, Alabama)...........................................................................................................51Hazelnut........................................................................................................................................56Elizabeth.......................................................................................................................................57What Is Real? Here's To Reality.................................................................................................................58Mary, Pic, Pete.................................................................................................................................59Mary............................................................................................................................................61Psychology......................................................................................................................................66The Study Of The Human Mind!....................................................................................................................67A fight with my Sisters.........................................................................................................................69Mary, Mary......................................................................................................................................77The Ouija Board.................................................................................................................................80What Is Real Ouija II...........................................................................................................................83Mr. Ouija and Me................................................................................................................................87Here's To Reality...............................................................................................................................89"You Abandoned Me"..............................................................................................................................91My Rose Bloomed Anew............................................................................................................................96Dedication to For Naomi.........................................................................................................................96Well! Here's to another day in the life of Willie Means.........................................................................................99Little Spider...................................................................................................................................102A Ride In The Snow..............................................................................................................................107New Years 2009..................................................................................................................................115Oh By The Way(My life in a nutshell)............................................................................................................117Victoria........................................................................................................................................118Just A Chance...................................................................................................................................120Dedication to...................................................................................................................................120The End(I am a Fucking Dinosaur)................................................................................................................122

Chapter One

Bessemer, Alabama 2731 Eighth Avenue North

Four double-tenant houses sitting in a hollow Filled by families with love, no one they bothered Ms. Rosie McNeil and Mary Lucille Jake and Laura lived in sorrow Ms. Ada Baker, my "Big Momma" Daddy and Momma, we were humble Mr. Frank and Mom, Ed, Des, and Tee They shared a whole house with Pickaninny Cannonball and Ethel with their children Bay Bundy and Gundy Gundy, Chicka-Bo was my Honey Mr. Hooker completed the list Ed and I met his granddaughter, a pretty little miss Nothing but fun for us when the weekends would arrive Life was strong and innocent, everybody was alive

I remember my daddy worked in the mines. Momma used to get up an fix him lunch when he got a break. Daddy would sit me on his hip and rock me up and down while he cut onion up in some black-eye peas. If my Daddy did not like his job, you would never have known it. Ht always had a smile for me and he would sing this song. "I'm way down in jail on my knees. They feed me off of cornbread and peas." Daddy also played a harmonica. One of his friends played a guitar and another one played a bass that stood on the floor. My daddy drank and so did his friends. When they had drank so much, they would began to tell SCARY stories. The one I remember most was the story of a man's face in a courthouse window, in Carrollton, Alabama, that would not go away. I would hide under the bed because he would make me leave the room when they got to talking about such stuff.

There was a freed slave who was passing through Carrollton, Alabama. Someone had been burning courthouses and other public buildings in the area. The freed slave was accused of committing these crimes. The freed slave, it was said, begged and pleaded for his life and repeatedly told the people in the town he was innocent. There was no trial. The freed slave was carried outside of town and a rope was tossed across a tree. The freed slave told the lynch mob to prove his innocence, they would never get him out of the town. The story is told that after they hung the freed slave, the lynch mob congratulated each other and headed back into town only to find a crowd gathered in front of the courthouse. Pushing through the crowd to the front, the lynch mob saw a reflection of the freed slave's face in one of the courthouse windows. The story is told that they took the window out, but the freed slave's reflection came in another window. After numerous attempts to get the face out of the windows, they decided to leave it alone and come up with their own story as to why the freed slave reflection was in the window. They said the freed slave was looking out the window as the lynch mob gathered and lightening flashed and etched the freed slave's reflection in the window.

In 1976, I left Chicago and went to Reform, Alabama to find my daddy, and I did. One day, while out and enjoying just being together again, we pulled up in a parking lot in Carrollton, Alabama. Daddy got out and began to roll a Prince Albert cigarette. "Buster, you remember when me and my friends used to talk about that man's face in the window?" My reply was, "Daddy! I'm a grown man now, and don't be trying to scare me with that children's stuff."

"Yeah. I figured you thought we were just telling stories. Look up at that window in the top."

Well, the sun was at an angle that caused you to put your hand up to shade your eyes. At first, my eyes began to water and I had to wipe them. When I looked again and my eyes focused, I began to back away from the image that was cast in the window. You could plainly see the face of a person with a hat on. There was indescribable agony where the eyes and mouth were. You could also see the rope leading from his neck. Needless to say, that chilled me for the reminder of that day and years that followed. While stationed on Kelly Hill with the 197th Infantry Brigade (Mechanized) (Heavy) in 1984, I took some buddies of mine to Reform. I told them I wanted to show them something in a place down the road. Like good soldier boys, they were bold and challenging and ready to tackle hell with a bucket of water. Well, I guess that man's face was just too much for my buddies. I remember Ward - Dwayne Ward ('AKA' "King Dog"), told me, "Buster, we got to go. Why you had to show us something like that?" Normally, it was PARTY! PARTY! PARTY! With my 'Inner Circle' buddies. However, that night, we all just sat in with my father and watched some television.

Weekends Should Last Forever

Ed Eason was my friend We suffered through it all, thick and thin Ed, Des, and Willie Tee We were just like brothers, people could see Monday through Friday, we all did school We all had to learn the 'Golden Rule' Friday evening began our weekend The grown-ups got together all the rules we could bend Pullman's Steel Mill, the mines, or where they worked The neighborhood got together, no one got hurt The men got together, they drank and clowned The ladies looked so lovely in dresses like gowns The children ran errands, they went to the store A quarter bought a lot in 1964 Ice cream, cake, and candy Man, those weekends sure were dandy The time arrived, we all split up Something better for everyone, life can be tough

From Outdoor Toilets To Indoor Plumbing

It is after midnight, I need to use the stool The toilet is outside, it's dark, I am no fool The thing in the coal yard will make its presence known The pounding on the oil drum makes you so alarmed The spiders in the web are big and shining black The smell in those toilets makes you want to get back Some weathered wooden sheds sitting to themselves Covering a hole in the ground and of course, You know what else Your greatest fear is to possibly fall in People wondering where you are, not knowing your end Nine-twenty Fourth Avenue was our new address Momma was closer to her job and she needed the rest A new neighborhood and neighbors too We had indoor plumbing, this was all so new Our wood heater was gone, but we had a fireplace A toilet in the middle room, this pat a smile on our face The final room was the kitchen and another wood stove Happy we were, but a story needs to be told While out to play one day, my sister gave a shout Did you see the little girl and boy? We had a problem no doubt.

What Is Real? (Here's To Reality)

Roxanne came to the back door and asked me where did the little boy and girl go to. My new friend, Philip, and I looked at each other and I told my sister we did not see anyone come out of the house. I continued to play, but this stayed in my mind. Roxanne was my oldest sister, and like the rest of us, she saw spirits. Momma said we all had been born with this stuff on our faces the 'Old People' called veils. From my understanding, this meant you were spiritual sensitive. Whether it is seeing, hearing, or feeling, you knew when a spirit was around. Some like to just say ghost. However, I was taught and learned there is a difference. You had a spirit; a ghost; and worst, a haunt (pronounced "haint" by many from the South)! At an early age, we had our "baptism of fire", so to speak, when Daddy put us out after Momma tried to kill him. Yes, my momma tried to kill my daddy. She found out, like many Black men back in the Fifties, h e had more than one wife. Momma had pus us all in the back room in the house at 2731 Eight Avenue North when it was almost time for Dad to get off work. If I have not mentioned it yet, I was always hiding under the beds or in the closet to see and hear what I could. Many times I did not know what I was hearing or seeing, but it sure sounded and looked good. Probably the reason I got spanked a lot when momma's friends would talk about how cute I was and grab me and squeeze me to their chest. My hands, at a very tender age, had learned that the flesh on the inside of a woman's thighs was very soft and appealing. Anyway, as I was saying, I was peeking through the crack of the door and I saw Momma hiding behind the door when Daddy got ready to come through the door. I do not know what made my daddy jump back, but when he did, my momma buried the cutting edge of a hatchet in the door frame. Years later, when I had found my daddy again, I asked him about that day. As usual, he was surprised that I remembered such a thing. He told me to that day, he do not know what made him jump, but he was glad he did, I always told myself that the Lord Jesus knew we needed out momma and that is why she was unsuccessful at killing Daddy.

Well, when Daddy put us out, Momma got this man to let us move into what we dubbed "The Little Round House." I never knew the address of the house, but it was across from the front of Mitchell and Thomas Coal Yard. Would you believe even in the daytime, I could not stand to look across the street at that place? There was always a man sitting outside the door smoking a pipe. I tried to show him to my sisters and brother, but they said they did not see anyone. Needless to say, I had figured out it had to be the security guard that had gotten killed over there and would beat on those oil drums at night. One day, Joyce and I were playing in the house and I looked over and I called Joyce and told her where to look. SHE SAW HIM! This, of course, scared me even more. That night, Joyce woke us all up screaming. On top of her screaming, she also had blood running down her face. Momma told us a rat ad bit Joyce, but I never saw a mark. It was less than a week later Roxanne woke us all up yelling for Momma. By the way, Joyce, Dot, and myself (Buster), we all were small enough that we slept in a baby bed together. When Roxanne woke us up that night, she told Momma she needed to use the pot (slop-jar called by many). She saw this lady standing by the pole in the middle of the room and she thought it was Momma. When she called Momma two times and Momma did not answer, she knew it was not Momma. She ducked her head under the covers and when she peeked towards the pole, the lady was gone. Roxanne said she thought she had imagined the whole thing and she threw the covers back from her head. When she did this, Roxanne said the lady was standing by the bed looking down at her. That is when Roxanne woke us all up screaming for Momma. When Momma got Roxanne calmed down, Roxanne told Momma that as she screamed for her, the lady was floating back to the pole and repeatedly telling her to "call madea, call madea." Roxanne said when the lady got to the pole, she vanished. (A lot of our fifty-cent pieces, quarters, nickels, and dimes vanished into that same damn pole. Me, Joyce, and Dot said it was our piggybank and we used to put the coins in a slot in the pole. When we moved and they tore the house down to build the Tabs' home, I will bet somebody got happy to discover our bank). The next day when J.D. (I remember this is what Momma called the guy) came, Momma explained to him what happened and called Roxanne, and J.D. asked Roxanne to describe the lady. I was looking through the door when Roxanne got through describing the lady. You could actually see J.D. turn shades lighter as he told my Momma that was his mother Roxanne described. He told Momma his mother said she did not want anyone living in her house, but he did not believe in any of that stuff.

Well, Daddy contacted Momma and told her he was moving to Reform, Alabama, and the rent was paid on the house for several months and Momma could move back into the house. We did. So you see, when Roxanne asked me about the little boy and girl, it stayed on my mind.

School had started in September 1965, and I was home sick one day. I was ten years old but from a very early age we had been cleaning the house and cooking. I had the house to myself and I was feeling better, so I got up and cleaned the house and was washing dishes when I looked in the middle room and I too saw a little boy and girl standing and watching me. My first thoughts were it was Donald Ray and his sister Gwen from next door. When looked closer, I realized it was not them. I asked "How did you get in here?" The kids turned and walked to the front room. I followed and came in the front room just as the kids went in the fireplace. I opened the door and ran to the front porch. One of the neighbors saw me and asked was I feeling better and I told him yes. He told me I had to stay in the house so the truant officer would not see me and try to take me to school. I wanted to tell him what I had seen and that I was afraid to stay in the house. Instead, I went back through the house and opened the back door and let my dog, Rusty, in and finished washing dishes. When my sisters and brother got home, I had dinner ready, but I did not say anything to them about what I saw. When Momma got off work and had eaten and was reading her Bible, I began to tell her what had happened. Roxanne heard me and she told Momma she had seen them before too, but did not want to bother her with it. Momma gave us both a scare when she said she had been seeing them almost every night but did not want to alarm us because we needed a place to stay. Momma said almost nightly the two children would sit in front of the fireplace and play jacks. She said normally when she made a noise, they would look up at her and vanish. Momma told us not to tell our sisters and older brother because she did not want them frightened.

I had not seen the children for a while, but we all heard noises in the house and had learned to live with it. One day, I believe it was in November of the same year, I was home and in the kitchen cooking when I looked up and there they were in the middle room looking at me. Once again, I followed them into the front room and they went into the fireplace. I remember I said, "I am going to find out what is in this fireplace!" I was bold enough to bend down and try to look up into the fireplace, but it was dark. I then reached up in there with the poker and a brick fell out and then a "hook bill" knife fell out too. I jumped up and just stared at the knife. The knife was covered with reddish black stuff and I had no idea at the time what it was. I took the knife and wrapped it in a cloth and put it under Momma's mattress to show here when she came home.

(Continues...)

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