Giving In with Dignity

Is it really nothing but a number?
That's shrouded in intrigue and mystery?
They say it's bad manners to ask,
And treason to ever my dear disclose.

Looking for lines and colors of gray,
It's been suggested that this maturity lark
Will give the game away when exposed
As a lie upon the grand entrance of
Mutton dressed as a lamb. Hee-hee.

Is it really all in a tonic jar that watches?
You sink deeper into its clutches whilst hoping
That you'll swim into the arms of extended youth.
The telltale signs are written on the wall,
Set out in a game called "bugger off and mind your own."

Tired and weary, you turn the corner and
See contentment supported by fulfillment,
With a glass full to overflowing where things
Can only get better with belief in self-acceptance
And embracing a joyfulness, yet more to come.

In continued age, you will not be dejected,
Invisible, or unwanted when you continue
To listen to faith's soft whisper directly,
Tapped into your soul to please accept
The many lessons passed this way and to come.

Push forward and revel in being a carefree spirit
On a path to greater heights where age and
Accumulated numbers are academic
When giving in with dignity!

November 16, 2011
Revised January 3, 2016


The Light Has Gone Out! Or Has It?

There was a light that burned with energy so fierce
That it lit up paths in its way for those known and unknown.
Its fiery flames of burnt orange and red often danced
In a joyous, contagious sway, igniting a warmth
In love with those most precious to it.

In the distance, a black cloud loomed, and the light
Watched it closely as slowly the darkness made
Its descent, smothering, till eventually it choked light,
Who, with its revitalized strength, fought back and
Regained its beauty and passion with a renewed vigor.
But quickly, without warning, the darkness engulfed light
Until the last flicker had been suppressed, and the light
Had no reserve to fight back.

The light has gone out, but has it when both its vibrancy and
Free spiritedness still seem to dance around in the air,
Spreading a continued playful affection of love,
With passion to those who see it vividly? They
Feel its essence and beauty burning brightly
In every direction they look.

So has the light gone out, or is it to remain
A treasured fixture that if you look hard enough
You might believe it was never extinguished?

Lights like these never diminish; they continue to grow.

May 2010


You Left Too Soon

Looking through the eyes of pain, I see hope calling me
With a smile that could mend a shattered heart.
As I reach her, I feel her positive energy as her breath
Reaches me, and with her gentle touch, she says,
"Hush, don't cry. You are still very special to me."

The light of life burns bright until life's certainties show up,
Taking away those special souls, erased with a rubber till they
Cease to exist in flesh, but their gift of life left in you remains
Burning fiercely, guiding you to your destiny as the first tear appears.

You left too soon, without a goodbye: no word, no cry or sigh.
And you were gone. I searched high, low in my mind and heart,
But I couldn't find you. I didn't see you disappear like a silent whisper.
Tell me when I will see you again 'cause you were gone too soon.
Will you tell me when I will see you again? 'Cause you were gone
too soon.

My mind is a swirl, clouded and misted in pain. Behind my eyes
Lies nothing but pain and a fading essence, taken away with
Its sharp, short intake and a voice that is barely audible.
I didn't see it coming. I was wrapped up in my life. I couldn't
Know it would feel this way until the first teardrop appeared.

You left too soon, without a goodbye: no word, no cry or sigh.
And you were gone. I searched high, low in my mind and heart,
But I couldn't find you. I didn't see you disappear like a silent whisper.
Tell me when I will see you again 'cause you were gone too soon.
Can't you tell me when I will see you again? 'Cause you were gone
too soon.

I'm lost in a maze, fighting my way back to the surface,
Gasping for air, determined to live and reclaim the legacy.
You left me the prize of life and all that it will give me.

You left too soon, without a goodbye: no word, no cry or sigh.
And you were gone. I searched high, low in my mind and heart,
But I couldn't find you. I didn't see you disappear like a silent whisper.
Tell me when I will see you again 'cause you were gone too soon.
Please tell me when I will see you again 'cause you were gone too soon.

September 19, 2013


The Invisible Cloak

My heart stopped dead
As I watched the life slowly leave.
It was like the last dredges of air in a balloon.
It collapsed and disappeared into a blackout room.
The intense sadness of tears fell like hail stones,
Hitting my face like a level five hurricane on the run.

A barely perceptible whisper
Moved into the atmosphere. "You will be okay.
Just believe it as your faith has taught you."
So why do I feel surrounded by mocking,
Taunting eyes muttering teasing messages?
"Did you really think life was a sunny beach in Cuba?
Well, not for you, not just now."

How did I not see deceit?
Conversing with liars, both holding hands,
Blocked from my vision whilst I busied with life,
Concealed like the Harry Potter invisible cloak.
They slipped by before revealing a one-eyed, withered snake
That plotted a destructive mixture of pain deeper than still waters.

But faith is a good ally
Who is always by my side in the front and back,
Alongside reliable hope, who is my champion.
So I say, do your worst. Watch me become stronger.
I can only thank you for the hurt and sorrow
Whilst you watch. Success will be the endgame.

December 4, 2011
Revised January 3, 2016


Thorn

A thorn slipped under my radar whilst intuition
Was prodding and poking me, but I turned the other way,
Saying I'm too busy to listen now. "Go away," I grunted.
It wore a disguised mask of a trusting smile whilst
Secretly laughing and reveling in plans to befriend me,
Dialing stress to smugly fit into that store called my life.

Digging deep into your skin, it twists. "Ouch," you squeal
When you see confusion and mayhem in the front-row
Seats, eating popcorn and enjoying a newfound power.
The game is tennis, exhausting to watch let alone play.
When you're not Serena Williams, it's not a game to match.

Your mind's first serve was tentatively played, trying to
Feel its way whilst unsure if it was a friendly or an out-and-out
Strategy to win the Wimbledon Cup. Please — what else is it!
The board showed a match point, and you know you must
Quickly decide if you must dig deep to defeat or compromise.
You could retreat and leave the thorn to play the game on its own!

Watching the thorn across the net, you start to see the shape
Of a vulture circling what it perceives to be a wounded animal,
Feeling Lady Luck has arrived, licking its lips, visualizing the carcass.
It will devour this feast fit for the appetite of the dark shadow
Of win and control, with an objective completely unknown.

Switching tactics, you send an urgent text to logic asking,
Who is the best trainer in developing undetected plans that, once
Served, will and must hit the target, thorn, with a force that
Will knock it reeling to the floor, powerless to recover? Match over.
Upon receipt, the fait accompli is served, and thorn looks
At the board and sees it's a 6–1, 6–2 win supported by logic,
Integrity, and pragmatic knowing its removal is a permanent one!

Intuition is a guide, an ally, a best friend for forever, whilst
Thorn is simply a pain in the —!

January 31, 2016


Trust

In acknowledging the past, I see quandary stuck
At the crossroad of change. She's prompting me,
Pushing that green light in life. It is all systems go.

I'm quiet in this moment as I try to listen to my heart.
I know I must safeguard her with all of my might.
She is bright, fun loving, and free-spirited in splendor,
But as I watch, why is she still crying?

I see tears like hail stones cascade like a waterfall
Of pain mixed with sorrow, and she's shouting,
"I'm bruised and oh so shattered." It's back to the
Fetus position, the protection of life.

See, the alarm siren was activated, her breathing,
The pattern so short it felt panicked, stricken.
Will its small vessels tied up in me just close?
She is searching in darkness and is looking for

Trust, who once in abundance is now burnt to a dust.
She notices Love, and its soul is extinguished,
Withered, exhausted, and in a coma, all laid out, no fight.
For nights, days, and the years, it's remained in this state.

It screamed, and it pleaded in tears of unthinkable cries.
They reverberated like a ball bouncing on cold walls.
Exhausted one day, it lay still on an altar and watched
It sacrificed like a lamb. It was slaughtered at dawn.

Now Trust sits shaking and trembling in fear.
Trust's eyes are of emptiness, the avenue to the soul.
Now veiled in steel, enclosed in a protective vault,
Both code and key patterns are still unknown.

You had it, gave it away for a reason discussed
With you and self that was hidden from view,
In a mirrored reflection, back dating into a past.
It's here and now, pleading; resuscitate it back into our life.

What can you offer in terms and conditions?
Enforceable collateral for its restoration or that
Continued tender embrace. The picture you see is
Caution. Is its safeguard a trained army positioned?

At the stair to Trust, with Heart encased in ivory tower,
It silently watches this gift and shouts, "Entry denied."
She longs for that feeling that used to lift her world.
Yet now unsure of its existence, Hope steps into

The framework with the board of directors.
"Scared, Anxious, Pain, and all associated chums."
The agenda to sign or not on the dotted line will release
Trust and its heart, possibly into uncertain fated arms.

The jury is out for this life-changing decision,
Yet if Trust could reach out and regrab what once was
Unwavering belief, the justice system of the
Universe and with all that he knows, then

As the custodian of the leap of faith, Trust knows
He will never let her go, so she tumbles or falls.
But with denial in place, what will Trust do?
The jury has left ...

March 24, 2015


Awaiting Repair in the Garage

Someone I trusted stepped on my heart, and
As they did, I sat and watched the life in it
Expel like a gentle mist leaving, heart gasping.
So resuscitation was given, and although
Emotions fought a brave fight, nothing more
Could be done to revive it into any state of being.
Lifeless and limping, it was cajoled with loving care,
Willing it not to give up but to come back and fight
And to leave trepidation behind in the corner, but
Sadly its life evaporated with the heir to the throne,
Despair in chief position, the Alice in Wonder cat.

The air became thick with a primeval, wrenching cry
For help that rivaled labor pains, except without
The euphoria of giving birth, of holding the baby
In your arms. You felt cheated all in one even whilst.
Although the labor process had supportive calls to take
Slow, deep, and controlled breaths and shouts of
"You'll be fine, not long to go," now you're told
Maybe six months, a year, or better still, call it
"An undefined lead time" with suicide and revenge.

Sitting ringside, rubbing their hands whilst placing bets,
They started to party! You see, as that teenager,
Weren't you told there would be romantic comedies?
With always a happy ending, but did the script
Get changed for a concrete block being dropped
From the greatest height onto an unsuspecting heart?
"Love and until death do us part" strangely were
Substituted for "a demon of intense pain, humiliation,
And its lifelong associated friend, heartbreak."
It seems a thief robbed you of the sunny beach script

With beautiful white sand, the sun, turquoise blue sea,
Plus a cocktail or two. Please note, the party's still going on!
Immediately the heart police were called to investigate.
At the crime scene, their first observation noted showing
Clear evidence of the sheep in wolf 's clothing, with
Tracks showing a quick getaway by car, a plane,
Plus speedboat and reports to having been seen
Sipping Pimm's cocktails in a bar in a faraway land,
With maybe a new heart who seemed to be, yes,

Infatuated or possibly in love mode. How could this be?
The heart police advise it's a good source but to be confirmed!
They also wanted to know, how did it happen with such training?
There was total silence, and they asked, was trust in the lead?
Were boundaries of defenses and control checks removed indefinitely?
"And, yeah, was love allowed in the room?" they asked, shaking their
heads!
"Shame," they said. "We see this all the time, so if you venture into
it again,
Be more cautious, but until then, simply put a sign in your eyes
(The gateway to heart), stating the following, and you should be
okay, love."

Heart plus its associated friends are in the garage awaiting repair.
At the moment, diagnosis and solution yet to be determined.
Currently its estimated time of return to the road is ...?
But please watch this space and follow updates on Twitter!

January 29, 2011


Death to a Past

I see an uncomfortable past floating into the distance,
Carrying in its lap a broken and bruised heart, tears,
And a truckload of fears, pushing along so much pain.
It represented that of the middle eye of the storm,
But with a smirk on its face of "job well done," feeling
So self-assured you didn't notice the head ripped off.
It had turned and started to rise above the ropes, but
You remained captivated by the eyes of a gentle soul
That was a like a soft egg sprinkled with gentle,
Loving, warm, captivating eyes of melting brown sugar.
You failed to notice, hidden deep within a determined
Force, fighting for its life in a true gladiator assurance.
Its energy not to be reckoned with, you brushed it aside
With arrogance tightly in hand. Again you didn't notice
A quiet closing of the door and the snip bringing new life,
The undeniable umbilical cord from the giver of new existence.

See, it had given you years of survival taken for granted.
Then the consensus voted that now it was your time to die.
There was no proper burial, a headstone, a sign of love,
Words of endearment, or any grieving at the graveside.
Only a lone silhouette of a calm elegance that turned,
Walked away with no tears or wet tissue in hand for this death.
Instead, a joyous beating heart for the demise of an
Evil, sophisticated, unwanted presence that had rooted
Unknown, lurking in the shadows of mind, not as a friend
But in truth a powerful enemy filling up the well of life.
With so much unnecessary foolishness like a thief,
You stole so many years, but now may you rest in peace "not."
Please be sure you will never cross this door into this life again.
With victory on board and the fight resolved, things quietly
Started taking shape. Deep within, an allegiance had already
Formed with a past offering memories of smiles, joy, love, and
So much more, should one want to explore its almost happy ever after.

No longer is there a need to challenge you to pistols at dawn
When we have upbeat and happy on board, and let's face it:
You where always dispensable and in fact didn't like to say, but,
Well, your place is already filled. How do you like that!
Heart, body, mind, and soul have already embraced anew,
Living harmoniously with here and now and the wonders
It has to share from within its very own twenty-four-hour
convenience store.
So your game and trickery of mind hasn't worked when
You ultimately only served to strengthen my friend resolve.
It's time to say thank you whilst not wishing you well,
Just a very enormous, happy death to an unwanted past.

March 10, 2015