CHAPTER 1
Introduction
Aunt Edna is a household word
A gem, a jewel, a national treasure, her big beautiful eyes and her wide, endearing smile will captivate your heart and enslave you forever.
I have to admit that the title of this book, Telling It Like It Is: The Remarkable Life Experiences of my Aunt Edna, may be a bit misleading. My Aunt Edna is about seeing the world like it is, living her life the best way she can, and helping anyone who happens to cross her path. Aunt Edna is also a loving, caring person--the kind of person who would pick up a wounded animal and try to heal any physical injury it may have. Likewise, she would take in a person needing love or encouragement and put a bandage on any emotional hurts she finds. Let me take a minute to put on my artist smock and pick up my brushes and art palette. Then I'll be ready to paint a vivid portrait of Aunt Edna--one that's real and in living color. At this point, I'm officially declaring that although I'm talking about my mother's younger sister, it is clear to me that anyone resembling Aunt Edna or possessing the same exceptional charisma and character should be referred to as an "Aunt Edna" and henceforth become a noun and a household word.
Big things come in small packages; the BEST things come in small packages too
It is important to mention right from the start a very significant fact with respect to Aunt Edna--size is not a factor. Good things come in small packages as do big things. Aunt Edna is the epitome of the word BIG. Aunt Edna is 92 years old, and I should tell you honestly that she was taller in her earlier years. Today she stands slightly under five feet tall and tips the scale at less than 85 pounds. But allow me to describe her better. She is the perfect picture of that little old lady who drives to church every Sunday. Merely looking at her would instantly set two Good Samaritans against each other in armed combat to defend her honor, or she would attract every self-proclaimed hero (with or without cape) to her side protect her from harm. Aunt Edna is the little old lady that every Boy Scout dreams of taking by the arm and stopping traffic to escort her across the street--even if she doesn't want to go.
Our Aunt Edna goes "malling" pronunciation [maúl-ing] (the practice of frequenting malls to socialize or shop). In Aunt Edna's case, it is the practice of frequenting malls before the shops open for the express purpose of exercising through power walks or slow walks or merely getting out of the house. Everyone walks in the same direction so as not to hinder fast or normal walkers. Aunt Edna goes malling at a shopping center in Hyattsville, Maryland almost every morning from 8 to 10 a.m. when the shops open for business. Sometimes when she gets tired of walking the around mall concourse in one-directional circles, she sits on the benches watching shoppers going about their daily business. She often dines at a favorite restaurant in the Prince George's Plaza and continues to drive her car almost everywhere she goes. She's an expert at riding the Metro Rail System in Washington, Maryland and Virginia and enjoyed the maiden voyages on the Silver Line to Tysons Corner and Dulles Airport in Virginia. Recently, she resumed her line dancing classes with her friends. She had to put that activity on the back burner only because she fractured her hip in three places.
She has always been a cultural aficionado with a touch of class when it comes to the social circuit of life--going to the cinema, operas and dinners in downtown Washington DC more often than I do. Her diminutive physical statue is totally overshadowed by the larger-than-life essence, unabated charm and integrity that radiate from her. And while she possesses so many positive attributes, she surrounds herself in modesty. Her humility is deeply rooted and sincere. She absolutely refuses to boast, often dismissing her entire life as being ordinary, insisting that she leads an uninteresting life. I absolutely must contradict her modest definition of her nondescript lifestyle with two words that I think are appropriate. ... au contraire!
What better way to convince you that Aunt Edna is anything but uninteresting than to have you read it for yourself in the following passage that I wrote about her in 2013:
As a matter of fact, she IS the boss of you
To tell the truth, little old ladies who live nondescript lives will not be found in my family. Giving much love and credit to my own mother, Aunt Edna heads the list of the most beautiful people in my life. She's that special aunt, you know the one. Aunt Edna can be described as petite and belle — tiny and cute. She is under five feet tall and never weighed more than 100 pounds, fully clothed or soaking wet. Everyone who saw her as a child vividly exclaimed, "She is so cute, just like a little doll." They still stop and stare today and can't refrain from those "Isn't she cute" remarks, although she says she wishes they wouldn't make such a fuss over her. Aunt Edna was the fourth of seven children. She was always a live wire, and we all knew that Edna ruled! She was the boss of everyone, including her older siblings. She knew how to throw her weight around and make her 80 some odd pounds count. She always knew what she wanted in life and she got it. My Aunt Edna was a mover and a shaker and still is today. She had no doubts about where she was going, and she succeeded in everything she did. If I were to use her own words to describe her, I'd have to say that Aunt Edna is a "pistol."
A veritable treasure trove of colorful expressions
However, nothing in my lifetime memories would indicate that Aunt Edna was anything but an angel. She is the most loving person I know, with a touching, natural empathy and a caring personality. She took care of her parents and her siblings, even those several years her senior. Aunt Edna still found time and had lots of love for other people in her life — family and friends of all generations. And she called us all "Precious." That word worked wonders for everyone. To be called "Precious" by her is one of the greatest gifts any of us could get from anyone. To Aunt Edna, we are all "Precious," and I swear the word came out as gold dust. Everyone wanted to be her "Precious." It seemed that we children would jostle each other just to get into the position of being sprinkled with those golden words, "Hi Precious."
She was not only generous and compassionate at home; she also went out into the community and neighborhood to help people who needed her attention. She volunteered for many years for the Bunker Hill Elementary School's Talented and Gifted Program and at the John Burroughs Montessori School. Her volunteer work included being a teacher's aide, substitute teacher, hall monitor, and excursion chaperone. She also served as Ways & Means Chairman for the Parent-Teachers Association.
When she was younger, Aunt Edna was also a professional ballroom dancer, performing exhibition dancing in ballrooms, cabarets, nightclubs and social events. Everyone admired her natural talent and her ability to use all of her senses and extraordinary flexibility to make the smoothest, exotically rhythmic movements. Due to her tiny size, she performed the most unexpected steps with ease, capturing her partners' moods and dancing with perfect coordination. She made the most amazing strides as she dipped and swirled to the tango. She shook her head, shoulders and hips for the rumba, and made the quick staccato steps for the samba. If she were to go on the now-popular TV reality program, "Dancing with the Stars" (one of her favorite TV shows), she would definitely score a perfect 10.
So, we dare not put her in the nondescript or uninteresting little old lady category just yet. If we did, she'd ask, "Who are you calling old?" Then, in her own words she would "read you like the funny papers."
You'll certainly see throughout this book that Aunt Edna uses an abundance of unique expressions. I've intentionally placed some expressions, adages and proverbs that Aunt Edna throws out to us at strategically recognizable points so that you can enjoy them like we have for years. In her own words, "When I wake up every morning and see the sky, and I hear myself breathe, it's a good day, and I'm good to go anywhere." Now that's what I'm talking about!
An elegant hat for every occasion makes her a jack of all trades
Aunt Edna is generous when dispensing her love to others. She gives 100 percent of herself in every situation that presents itself. She thinks about helping others long before her own self-preservation. She has always been a fierce defender of the downtrodden. In fact, Aunt Edna has performed some of the most difficult tasks, many of which would usually occur in the lives of elite professionals. Here are some examples of how far her knowledge stretches.
She's a doctor and a dietitian -- very knowledgeable about childhood diabetes. She can quote the exact amounts of carbohydrates and proteins needed on for a Type I diabetes patient's daily dietary regime to keep sugar in check and the specific dose of sugar required to maintain sugar levels under control. Coupled with precise daily dietary savvy she can also administer insulin intravenously. This expertise stems from the fact that she had hands-on experience with her grandson Bryan from an early age through adulthood. She is a therapist and counselor, giving sound guidance to many people who seek her wisdom and especially those who come to her for common sense advice. She's most certainly a spiritual leader, (I'd call her a para-guru) or as many call her, an angel. She earned this title by making herself available or being there when needed. She gives the biggest hugs and knows when to praise those around her who need a friend or who simply need her consolation. One look into her eyes or a glimpse of her loving smile would suffice to give them hope.
A loving mother who reared two children of her own. It goes without saying that she's also a mommy, mom, mamán, mère, mamí, mother, and of course, mama. I'd even go as far as saying that she's a universal mom who offers understanding and caring to everyone indiscriminately. She passes out hugs, kisses and words of encouragement to everyone, and is famous for reaching out to touch those who need to feel special! Her innate goodness tumbles out of her mouth constantly in the form of sweet names like Sugar, Baby and the all-time favorite, "Precious." That works miracles on small children because Aunt Edna is an extension of their own moms. The same alluring word is amazingly effective with adults too. More accurately, her words are kind and her deeds are uplifting. She's a public defender and sometimes she is a lead prosecutor, leaning on her years of experience witnessing life's injustices to offer wise resolutions. According to Aunt Edna herself, "Sometimes, life throws you a curve ball." To describe situations dealing with the ups and downs of life, Aunt Edna dons another hat, that of a poet. She likes to recite poetry, and the following, A Lowly Life, by Paul Laurence Dunbar, is one of her favorites.
A crust of bread and a corner to sleep in,
A minute to smile and an hour to weep in,
A pint of joy to a peck of trouble,
And never a laugh but the moans come double;
And that is life!
The best is yet to come
Of course as her biographer and her niece, I can't help but be partial. In other words, she can do no wrong, ever ... period! That's what special aunts are. In my own life, I can add another career to the list of professional expertise because besides being my very special aunt, she's a close friend. She also plays the role of literary consultant and has offered ideas for each one of my books. She gives her perspective on themes and consults with me about style and content. She is always nearby with encouragement and support, psychological, emotional and intellectual.
Actually, Aunt Edna has always been my very first client, frequently buying multiple copies of each book to give away as gifts to friends and family "just in case sales don't go well." But more importantly to the both of us, Aunt Edna is my first reader. She's the first person to sample poems or stories while they're still in the conception stage or the rarely-seen "draft" form. As soon as she knows that I've written something, she says, "Read it to me!" or "Where's my copy?" She loves to analyze, sample and digest my ideas just as much as I love to have her test unchartered waters before I officially put them on paper. She willingly volunteers to be my literary advisor because for some reason she is convinced that if I continue writing about everything on my mind and in my heart, then perhaps one day, one of my books will be a best seller. And as you can imagine, Aunt Edna forever stands on the pier patiently yet very anxiously waiting for our ship to come in. That makes me feel like singing the popular Otis Redding song, Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay.
By this time you can see why Aunt Edna is special. She and others like her are unique characters and in my personal opinion, have found their niche as household words. I should ask you a very significant question here. After achieving such a high status in our world, every Aunt Edna could be entered in Wikipedia, Google and some of the other well-known internet search engines. Here's your Double Jeopardy Clue: She's a person who loves unconditionally, makes herself available to everyone, provides hope and encouragement to many and spreads immense joy by making others happy. Correct Response: What is an Aunt Edna?
What is my Aunt Edna, you ask? She's an angel on earth who I'm grateful to have and she's the person I want to keep by my side forever. That is my personal definition of my very own Aunt Edna.
I could very easily give you a generic definition of an Aunt Edna. She's that sweet, unforgettable friend who just happens to appear when you need a helping hand or a bit of advice. She's magically nearby when you need an encouraging word or reassurance that everything will be alright. She'll also tell you that you're doing just great. Aunt Edna is that loving, unassuming person who can make even the hardest criminal think twice before doing something wrong, yet she's feared and respected to the point of getting a sheepish apology from him. She's the warm-hearted person whom grandchildren and great grandchildren proudly take to school on Meet Grammy Day. Finally, she's one person for whom babies, toddlers and young children conquer their ABC's and quickly count from one to ten (twice) just get that big hug or a little bit of her "sugar." She's that church elder everybody loves and respects &8211; she's "Mom" to adult men, women and children of all ages. So is it really necessary to "google" what an Aunt Edna is? I don't think so. We could easily recognize an Aunt Edna anywhere, anytime. Well, to provide the full Final Jeopardy Clue to the correct response of "Who is my Aunt Edna?" I'll leave you with the following excerpt from a poem I wrote about her.
Have You Met My Aunt Edna?
Have you met my remarkable Aunt Edna?
Well, here's one thing that you should know,
Make no mistake, she has that unique "Auntie" glow,
She's that very special Aunt, you know the one,
Her smile warms your heart like the morning sun,
One well-chosen word can make tears disappear,
Her comfort blanket of love chases away your fears,
A special hug tells you that you're the most precious of all,
She'll pick you up and brush you off, but she'll never let you fall.
Have you met my amazing Aunt Edna?
She's cute and delicate -- actually she's quite small,
Tipping the scales at 85 pounds, standing almost 5 feet tall,
But she's endowed with such an enormous heart,
There's a powerhouse of life's lessons in the advice she imparts,
She has weeded her own garden so only the loveliest flowers bloom,
Her humble presence spreads fragrance to every corner of the room,
But don't take her too seriously; she's the ultimate barrel of fun,
A living testament to life's battles she's fought and won.
Have you met my "cool" Aunt Edna?
She's a treasure trove of the quaintest expressions,
Each colorful proverb teaching life's valuable lessons,
And she strategically uses them to let you know,
There are things you shouldn't do, places you dare not go,
She can see through your little lies, hear false notes in your song,
She'll tell you in no uncertain terms if what you're doing's wrong,
Gentle yet persuasive, sensitivity and kindness come first,
Her winning smile and sparkling eyes are both a blessing and a curse.
Have you met my awesome Aunt Edna?
At eighty-nine years old she's still going strong,
With mind and body in perpetual motion all day long,
Still fearlessly driving, line-dancing, enjoying hours of shopping,
With few signs of slowing down and no intention of stopping,
Her plans for the future stretch well beyond ninety-nine,
Sitting around idle would be just wasting her time,
We have to work hard to keep up with her pace,
She's still a bundle of energy, thanks to God's grace.
Have you met my precious Aunt Edna?
She's like the most inspiring words or thoughts in your mind,
Like the softest velvet, the smoothest silk, the gentlest breeze of all
time,
She's the melodious tunes of songbirds each time they take flight,
And every reflection or silhouette that silently floats into sight,
She's the taste of sweet nectar as a single red rose bursts into bloom,
She's every positive emotion we experience when she walks into a room,
As sure as pastel rainbows transform the heavens after stormy
weather,
Proud generations will cherish our Aunt Edna forever.