JADEN

"If the doors of perception were cleansed everything would appear to man as it is, infinite." William Blake

When Carol was with me on the physical plane we were connected, our vibrations also reaching out to each other. It wasn't until a close mutual friend, Jaden, called me on the phone one day and told me that Carol had come to him, after she had crossed over, that she wanted to talk to me. A whole new, wonderful and blessed way of conversing with her was born.... through telepathic communication.

While we were talking on the phone he said, "Carol is here and she wants to talk with you." And so it started that Jaden acted as our Medium go between during this conversations. I asked questions directed to Carol and he, picking up the telepathic communication from her to relate to me.

One of my first questions was, what form she had taken. She related she had taken a younger version of herself. I have a good idea as to how she looks now because, before she crossed over, she came to me four times, each time looking young and vibrant. The night before she came to me I had gotten a phone call in the middle of the night from the hospital, informing me that she had stopped breathing and needed to be resuscitated, that they hoped they had gotten to her in time. She was in a deep coma and I felt the damage had already been done, that the lack of oxygen to her brain had caused irreversible damage. I felt, and knew, that she would not wake up from the coma and that, in all reality, she was gone from this world. They tested her brain function to be sure but, knowing as I did, and was not surprised when the tests showed she had only 20 percent of brain function left. So when she came to me the first two times that morning as I was waking up, I fully expected hearing the phone ring, telling me she had crossed over.

When it did not happen I went back to resting and, while doing so, she came to me two more times, with a wonderful warm smile and was very peaceful. Jaden told me that he saw Carol's mother, as an angel, at the side of her hospital bed, that she was there to help guide her home.

The next question was where she was and what she was doing. She said she was in heaven. When I asked her where heaven was, she informed me that the Universe is different from our understanding of it and that each planet has its own plateau known as HEAVEN.

She said that her memory from this lifetime was still intact and she carries these memories with her, including continuing the work she did here. I asked her how they do this in heaven, she replied that each of the souls have different ideas, then send them back to earth in a telepathic endeavor. While on the physical plane, Carol had a career as a Med-Tech/Hematologist. She worked for a medical software company, writing medical software which was installed in some of the major hospitals in the United States and Canada. She went on to say that there are so many working with her that she is never sure what are her ideas or someone else's. After she retired she continued working in technology by working at the Apple Store, where she became one of their top sellers. I was curious as to what type of work I would be doing when I crossed over and she informed me that she thinks it will be building schools for the children. This surprised me as I am not a teacher.

I asked her how she gets around and she said that she can be in several places at the same time. She specifically mentioned that as she was zipping around that she came across a field of flowers and that, as she went over them, they blossomed.

Having Carol come through Jaden felt like "HOME" for the three of us. Being I was in the depths of mourning, and was not sure how to handle the biting emotions of depression and abandonment, which were rampaging within, the phone call centered me greatly.

What was related from Carol through Jaden was a wonderful opening into our telepathic communication, which she and I now share.... even though it is much less now than it was at the beginning, which was about a month after she had crossed over. She explained, later on, that it was her way of helping me through the grieving period.

When Jaden called again, he said he wanted to tell me about a dream he had three weeks prior, one which all three of us were in. In the dream he saw me standing there and behind me was Carol, who was trying to get my attention. Being she was unable to do so she proceeded to enter into me.

While on the phone with Jaden, three different sprits came to both of us at the same time. First was Carol, and when he told me she was there, I felt her energy within me. Next I felt someone different and told Jaden that a new energy had entered my body, whom I believed was his twin brother. The third entity, one which was soft and felt differently from the previous two, was Kim, a close friend of Jaden's and a friend of mine. Jaden shared with me that he and Kim had been together life after life. It was so amazing to feel these different energies, each one so different from each other, each having their own signatures.

After Carol came through Jaden he contacted me that he was coming back to our area in order to sell his household items after having moved to Canada. I knew it would be fun and exciting to see him while he was in town. Thinking of Jaden, I easily remembered the good times Carol and I had spent with him, the laughter, the mind boggling discussions and even discussions about Apple I-Mac or the I Phone products. With her background in technology, Carol had been the catalyst in helping us finding our way around. Jaden had been very fast on picking things up, I, however, was another story.

Before Jaden arrived in town, I sent a message to Carol and asked her to please come to me while I was with Jaden, that it would be fun and wonderful for the three of us to relish this meeting together. She did show up, first by guiding me to some books that were left and had not been sold. I really was not very interested in what they were, so didn't look at them closely but then I was guided to take a second look, I came across a book by Erich Van Daniken which I had read; as I have read all his books.

The book was new so I picked it up to thumb though it, starting back to forward, which is a habit of mine. When I came to the first page there was an inscription. It turned out this was a book from Carol and myself, which I did not remember giving to him. Carol had written the inscription for the both of us. It was a total surprise to find this, yet another one of the coincidences I shall be talking about all through this book. I knew she had sent me over to find this book. Being that Jaden was selling everything I grabbed the book to show him. He too was surprised by finding the book and wanted to keep it, being it was from Carol and myself. I added a few more lines for him, as he is the most amazing person and a darling friend.

Carol than came to me telepathically to join with us and stayed for a long time. This time she wanted to talk to Jaden through me. We stopped short as people came in to look around.... Jaden asked about the "Great Hall", a question I had asked her prior. "Was it the Hall of Records?" She was able to relate she did walk though this Hall and could not see where it ended, only that it went on and on.

My feel for this, about the book and other coincidences, is the thought of: "Divine Intervention and Human Implementation."

The mantra I hold close is this: "Be Patient, Be Patient, Be Patient."

"Love is friendship set on fire." Jeremy Taylor

EARLY HAPPENINGS

"The wound is the place where the Light enters you." Rumi

As time went on I decided to make a video about the life Carol and I shared together. The making of the video diminished my time and was actually arduous at times, but it also gave me something to hold onto in the early days and helped me to mend, heal and become stabilized in myself again. It also gave me a deeper meaning into what our relationship was and the connection we always shared. I have to admit, I was very pleased as to how the video turned out. It included music and four different sections. The first section was about us, the second was about our dogs, the third was about our families, and the fourth section was about our friends.

It was also due to the connection we shared that she came to me after her crossing. One of the first happenings occurred here at the house:

It was a tormenting evening of grief, one of those when it is hard to quiet down emotions and one of those which overtakes a person's reason and sanity. The deep invading despair was hitting me like a ton of bricks, hitting me harder than it had before and I could not overcome the struggles. Seeking solace, I pulled our dogs close to me, hoping that would help break the deeply embedded sorrow. Usually, their little pug bodies would give me a feeling of calm as I felt their energy, however, this time it did not work.

Leaving the den, I paced around the house, sobbing my heart out and wishing I was not there. I finally ended up in the kitchen and while still sobbing I said out loud, "I wish you were here." I heard Carol's voice say: "I am." Again, I said out loud, "I wish you were here with me in person." Carol's answer came back again, "I am." Hearing her words I asked her "How?" and she replied. "I am in you."

Another early occurrence, which happened shortly after Carol crossed over, was also here at the house. Even before Carol's passing I was having some problems with her daughter, who was pushing me aside, and Carol had asked me not to push back, to let it go. However, it was a difficult situation and her daughter was very disrespectful towards me. After Carol crossed over it became even worse.

In order to gain some comfort, after Carol's crossing, I had placed several pictures of her around the house. One of the pictures I placed into a decorative planter in the living room. The planter sat well off the ground and the picture was well grounded and secured.

One of the confrontations I had with Carol's daughter was about Carol's clothes that had been taken to a consignment shop and I wanted to get the name of the shop so I could check to see if some of my clothes had been taken there as well by mistake. Upon my request for the information, the daughter, unfortunately, refused to tell me the name of the shop. I had been upset and unsettled by her behavior to the point of wanting to approach her, but I remained steadfast in order to keep my promise to Carol.

The next morning I found the picture, which had been secured in the planter, a few feet from the planter. None of the windows were opened, nor had any of the over head fans been turned on. There was no wind or breeze that could have dislodged the picture from the planter. Upon seeing the picture on the floor and the evidence of the lack of a breeze, I realized Carol had done this with a specific message. She wanted to let me know to back paddle and to let it go ...

Calming down and letting it go, I decided to go onto my computer and found a note from her daughter telling me the name of the consignment shop.

I had known, through talking with Jaden, that Carol could come to me through him. But, the first time she communicated directly to me I questioned it as being real. I never thought, before this happened, that I would be so openly blessed to have this sensitive shared experience with her. This was the start of many encounters we would often share in the first six months, some so deeply personal I can not share them in this book. They slowed down once I started to feel confidant and have renewed energy, which had been weakened by Carol's crossing.

One of things I had asked her, when she came through Jaden, was about her powers and her energies. She told me that the energies would grow stronger the longer she was in heaven and that she had to stop to recharge, almost like being in a vegetative state, until the energies were renewed. She also mentioned that she receives energy from me as I do from her. When I feel her energy, which later developed into a type of cloaking me, starting with my head, through my arms and into my body, it feels like soft energy, prickling with a very easy flow; which puts me at ease and gives me comfort. At that time her powers were just starting to become vast, but she wanted to spend time with me to help comfort me, to give me the stabilization I needed in order to find my pace again, to lighten my heart so that I would once again be filled with joy and laughter.

In one of our telepathic conversations, Carol told me that we have always been together and, therefore, when she left she was able to take part of my soul with her, and that I was given part of her soul to carry within me. This has happened life time after life time. Through this unconditional act of love I now understand fully the true meaning of what a soul mate is, as I feel her with me all the time.

"Make me immortal with a kiss. " Christopher Marlowe

METAPHYICS AND REMEMBERANCES