Far from the conventional parenting book, Know When to Hold 'Em will encourage readers as they see parenting and fatherhood through a new lens--that of adventurer, risk-taker. Blase moves into new territory to invite fathers and parents to look at the risk and challenge--and great rewards of parenting--as he invites readers into his imperfect, yet loveable homeWritten with the raw prose of one who is there, smack dab in the middle of possibly the greatest challenge of a person’s life, Blase says, “What I’ve seen so far has convinced me that being a father is a lot like gambling--fatherhood is a risk-tasking ventureFeaturing an intensely personal voice and filtered through a brass-knuckled optimism, this book offers what very few books on parenting do--the real, true, raw reality and joys of fatherhood.

Fragmento. � Reproducci�n autorizada. Todos los derechos reservados.

KNOW WHEN TO HOLD 'EM

THE HIGH STAKES GAME OF FATHERHOOD

By JOHN BLASE

Abingdon Press

Introduction............................................................... 1
1 The Work of Your Hands................................................... 7
2 Response-able Fathering.................................................. 11
3 Chancey Faith............................................................ 15
4 Stay Close............................................................... 19
5 Listening and Silence.................................................... 25
6 Making Space for Sad..................................................... 31
7 Time Out #1.............................................................. 35
8 Making the Cut........................................................... 37
9 What a Boy Needs......................................................... 43
10 The Needs of the Many................................................... 45
11 A Different Road........................................................ 49
12 Thanksgiving............................................................ 53
13 The Father Dream........................................................ 57
14 My Father's Gift........................................................ 61
15 The Vow................................................................. 67
16 But Sometimes........................................................... 69
17 Fully Naked, Almost Ashamed............................................. 73
18 Lucky Ones.............................................................. 77
19 Today Is Today.......................................................... 81
20 Everything to Heart..................................................... 85
21 Replacement Costs....................................................... 89
22 Waiting................................................................. 93
23 Lost and Found.......................................................... 95
24 Again and Again......................................................... 99
25 Time Out #2............................................................. 103
26 Quiver-full............................................................. 107
27 Madonna and Child....................................................... 111
28 Yesterday's Time........................................................ 115
29 New Year's Eve.......................................................... 121
30 A Real Boy.............................................................. 125
31 A Good Man.............................................................. 129
32 Five Things............................................................. 135
33 Time Out #3............................................................. 139
34 I Love You.............................................................. 141
35 Softly and Tenderly..................................................... 143
36 Communion............................................................... 147
37 Great Responsibility.................................................... 151
38 What I Want You to Know................................................. 157
39 The Old Ones............................................................ 163
40 Don't Forget Us......................................................... 167
41 Your Life............................................................... 171
42 Upon My Oldest Daughter's Confirmation.................................. 175
43 Days That Build Me...................................................... 177
44 A Father's Prayer....................................................... 181
45 Saturday Evenings....................................................... 183

CHAPTER 1

THE WORK OF YOUR HANDS

* * *

Linger.—Jack Gilbert

MY YOUNGEST DAUGHTER, Abbey, looked at me thisafternoon and asked, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"She's four. I said, "Yes" and winked at her; she winked backand returned to what she was thinking about. I have no ideawhat that was. But I wish I did.

What was she thinking about in that moment? What wasgoing on behind those saddle-brown eyes with falling auburnhair in them? I've been home quite a bit lately; I have somewriting deadlines and so many days have found me in thebasement, in front of a keyboard, from last star to first. She'sfour, so she's been home as well. She's come down to checkon me quite often, she doesn't stay long, just a little while.

Although I hear her coming down the stairs, she is convincedshe's sneaking up on me and greets me with a "boo"and I do my best startle and she always says, "It's me, Abbey."Many days she wants to go to a "dot-com" and print off coloringpages from the My Little Pony or Curious George websites.Even at four years old she displays a persistence that Ibelieve will carry her far in this life. So we usually sit and waitfor my printer to start its heaving, eventually coughing up picturesfor her to color. I've noticed on the last few visits thatshe has put her hand on my arm while presenting her case. Iwonder what she's thinking about. I hope she's thinking thather dad is so happy when she sneaks down the stairs to startlehim. That he's so relieved it's her, Abbey, whose name means"father's joy." I hope she's thinking that it's a good thing forher to put her hand on my arm and reassure her dad that hiswork these days in not in vain, although most days he's notsure, driving his family in a metaphorical covered wagonacross uncertain terrain in search of his dreams to be a writer.

I pray she's thinking that asking me for coloring pageswill help me keep some childlikeness in my afternoons thatfrequently border on the serious and anxious. I hope she'sthinking, I'll stand close enough to Dad so he can smell myhair. He helped me wash it last night and that'll make himremember the true work of his hands these days—fathering.He's got plenty of time to be a writer, but his days of fatheringare numbered. I'm four, but not for long.

And maybe that was what she was thinking about thisafternoon when she asked me if I knew what she was thinkingabout. "I'm growing up, Daddy, fast." Today it's dot-comsand "boo" and the man with the yellow hat, but tomorrow it'llbe girlfriends and boys and talking on the phone into the weesmall hours of the morning and saying, "Dad, please," when Istop and smell her hair.

I have no idea what my little girl's thoughts are; manydays I can't even fathom my own. But in the precision of thismoment I am grateful for her hand on my arm, and for herreminder that it is not a small thing when a child loves you.

In this moment that's what I'm thinking about.

Children have the gift of startling us awaketo the true work of our hands. Linger.

(Continues...)

Excerpted from KNOW WHEN TO HOLD 'EM by JOHN BLASE. Copyright � 2013 John Blase. Excerpted by permission of Abingdon Press.
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Blase, John

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