That We Might Have Joy: Desire, Divinity & Intimate Love

What if the path to deeper spirituality isn’t through resisting your sexuality—but through more fully embracing it?

For many Latter-day Saints, sexual intimacy is experienced as a pleasant pastime, a bargaining chip, a well of shame, a source of frustration—or even a necessary evil. Far less understood is its potential to be something much more: a source of deep joy, spiritual transcendence, and communion with another soul.

In a culture drawn to quick fixes and surface-level advice, That We Might Have Joy offers something deeper—an honest, in-depth look at how sexual intimacy acts as both diagnosis and cure for what ails modern marriage, and a meaningful invitation to create something richer and more connected. With clarity and compassion, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife reframes sexuality not as a threat to faith, but a pathway toward it. She shows how sexual intimacy can reveal the truth of a relationship—and how, for those willing to confront that truth, it can become the starting point for something far more soul-sustaining.

That We Might Have Joy is a call to greater integrity—within our marriages, our faith, and ourselves. It invites us to live more honestly, love more deeply, and discover what becomes possible when we heal the division between our spiritual and sexual selves.

Jennifer Finlayson-Fife is a therapist, educator, and coach with a doctorate in Counseling Psychology. For over two decades, she has helped individuals and couples—particularly within the LDS community—strengthen their relationships and develop a more integrated view of sexuality. Through her online courses, live workshops, and Room for Two podcast, she has supported the emotional and sexual development of thousands. Known for her clarity, compassion, depth, and humor, Dr. Finlayson-Fife is a sought-after voice on the topics of faith, intimate relationships, and personal growth.

REVIEWS

This book is a call to repent—to tell the truth, to look eros in the eye, to be the bodies that we are, to promise our souls, to break open our hearts, to brave intimacy. It's a call to live, to love, to die, to love. Don't wait. Repent. Live. Love.
—Adam S. Miller, author of Original Grace and Letters to a Young Mormon

That We Might Have Joy is a great gift—certainly to those of us who are in a love relationship, but to all who yearn to give equal honoring to both the sacred and the sensual in our lives and to realize they are partners indeed. Jennifer’s insightful book shines new light on the truth that God is love and love is godly.
—Carol Lynn Pearson, Author of Goodbye, I Love You

This is more than a book—it’s an invitation to a conversation in which you will see yourself and your relationships with greater clarity. The process of honest self-examination is rarely comfortable but is often empowering. Dr. Finlayson-Fife offers a path in which the erotic and the spiritual are integrated in ways consistent with—and enriched by—marital and religious commitments. Latter-day Saints will benefit from her clarity, insight, and guidance, while readers of many faiths will find growth-promoting wisdom, helping them pursue their own vision of sexual and spiritual health.

—Adam R. Fisher, PhD, ABPP