Finding Comfort After the Storm: A Parent’s Journal to Healing After Their Child’s Trauma

If your child has endured some form of trauma (sexual abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse, etc.) it is very common for parents and caregivers to go through an emotional turmoil following such events. You may feel guilt, anger, sadness, anxiety, and the list goes on. What is extremely important to understand, is that unless you were the actual perpetrator of this abuse, it is NOT your fault.

As parents and caregivers, you do all you can to love and protect your children from harm. Unfortunately, you cannot be everywhere at all times and, sadly, sometimes bad things do happen that are not within your control. Following a trauma your child has experienced, it is vital to obtain support for them, such a therapy, to help your child work through what they have endured. However, you too, as their parent or caregiver have also gone through this trauma with them. If you do not work on your own emotions and fall apart, you will be of little help to your child in their recovery. Therefore, it is of the utmost importance to take care of YOU as well!

Please work hard to get your feelings out, in one way or another, as this is extremely important as you begin to heal from the trauma which has touched your family. Journaling is a very good place to begin to express your emotions. My sincere hope is that this journal will help to guide you through your healing process and to get your feelings out, whatever they may be. You have every right to feel the way that you do, so please go ahead and use this journal as an outlet to get angry if you need to and to vent all of your feelings onto these pages. Leave no drop of emotion unwritten, simply GET IT OUT!

However, if you feel that journaling is not helping you with all of the emotions you are feeling, perhaps you may want to consider obtaining therapy for yourself as well. There is NO shame in doing so. Remember, your child needs support following trauma, but so do his or her parents and caregivers. You make the decisions regarding your path to healing; the important part is not to forget yourself throughout this process.

The road a family walks, following a trauma, is far from easy. Trauma has been known to both bring families together, as well as to pull them apart. Keeping your feelings inside, where they continue to build up until you very likely do or say something you may regret, will only increase the likelihood that your family will continue to suffer longer after the trauma. If you have a significant other who has endured this trauma with you, perhaps you may want to consider both having a copy of this journal to get your feelings out or attending therapy together. After doing so, having a daily, or at least weekly discussion about what you have written regarding your feelings could be extremely vital to your family’s healing process. These discussions will most likely not be easy at first, but in doing so, they will begin open up the line of communication and help you to heal together. Best wishes to you and your family throughout your healing process.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Lindsay K. Krebs obtained her Master’s Degree in Counseling from Alfred University. She has worked both as a school counselor, as well as for a non-profit agency with children who have experienced a wide variety of trauma. In doing so, Lindsay has years of experience working with both the children and their families to better communicate feelings related to the trauma and to work towards healing.