My name is Bob Carlini. I am a business man on Vacation. At the moment, I am sitting on this comfortable lounge chair, lying in the sun, basking and thinking about last night. I was involved in a poker game. As it happened, I had four aces, and placed a fairly large bet. The foreign gentleman to my left, must have felt he had me beat, since he took a handkerchief from his pocket, that was wrapped around an object, and put it right in the middle of the pot and raised the bet to double, and jubilantly showed his four kings.

With four aces, I naturally won the pot. He began screaming and yelling "You cheated, you are a bunch of crooks.". He pulled a revolver out and waiving mid air and shouted, "This game is fixed. I will kill you fucking bastard". Pointing the gun at me, he was subdued and escorted out of the building. The gun was confiscated. I thanked the men around me, picked up my winning pot and discretely walked the hell out of there.

The first thing I did this morning was to call you my Gumba's together, to see if anyone knows what this jeweled object is. It looks expensive, but I don't really know. Have any of you ever seen anything like this, or know what or where I should go with it. Come you fellahs, think.

"Looks like a paperweight", says one and shrugs his shoulders

"Maybe you could take out the jewels and go to Frannie the Pawn"

"Oh no, I wouldn't touch it or destroy it," says another.

"It really looks expensive, how much was the pot worth, maybe I would buy it from you".

"How about you guys look around and listen if there is any scuttlebutt about this object. Meet me back here tomorrow if you hear anything. I will give a small reward for the most info about this thing. I have got to find out what it is before I go berserk or just throw it away.

Ah, the sun is grand. I did not sleep well last night, so I need to relax, and lounge around. Hello there. Hmm but aren't you the sweet thing. May I buy you a drink of your choice. You look as lonesome as I feel.

I need some company. My name is Robert Carlini. How about you? You are an American. So am I. Aren't these Islands wonderful. The weather is just great. I actually got somewhat of a suntan. Tell me, have you been enjoying yourself? What is your name?

My name is Jennifer Cammerand. Yes, I am here on a vacation. I am a schoolteacher, of high school students. In a few days I will be returning home to the states.

What state are you from Jennifer. You have no particular accent, where I am told I have a definite brogue for the Bronx. Your speech is delightful.

I am from Brooklyn, Robert.

Gosh I have so many friends in Brooklyn, Jenny, may I call you Jenny, I am there more than at home. May I get you another drink. It is so pleasant sitting here talking to you. It upsets me that you will be leaving so soon. Jennifer, may I take you out for dinner tonight. I know so few people here, that I have been thinking of going home early. You are the sweetest thing that has happened to me since I arrived. I will meet you at the Steak and Brew at 8 p.m. How does that sound to you. Interested?

Just fine Robert. It is something to look forward to.

Do you have a bathing suit on?

Yes I do!

Lets go for a swim. It is very hot out today and we can cool off. Isn't this refreshing? Gosh you are a great gal Jennifer, with a great shape. I like your long hair when it floats on top of the water. Have you ever been to Las Vegas? No! Boy would I love to take you there. We could have so much fun.

Sounds enticing. Maybe my next vacation, I could meet you there.

Call me Bob, please.

Alright Bob, I will meet you tonight at the Steak and Brew. It is very nice of you to take such an interest in me. I have not had much luck in meeting any nice gentlemen, or making friends. But the beaches and the sun made up for it.

You certainly have a lovely suntan Jenny, and your hair is absolutely gorgeous. Long, and wavy black. Lets sit here for a while, before you have to go in and dress for dinner. Tell me about your family.

Well Bob, I have one sister Abigail, two years younger than me, and a brother John, who is the Assistant D.A. in our district. Now tell me about your family.

Well Jennifer, I am the third of five children. Two older sisters, and two younger brothers. My sister are social workers. One for the school district, and the other in private practice. They are just the best, swell gals. They worry about me all the time. My Mother is a gem of a woman. She is always cooking and cleaning. My Dad is a cop. Twenty Four years on the force. He is about to retire. You might as well know, I am the black sheep of the family. I like to drink once in a while. I also like to play craps, and gamble. I have never been so open with anyone, so fast, in my life. Jennifer I have been thinking about flying over to Vegas for a little fun. What would you think about cancelling out the three days left on your ticket, and fly over to Vegas with me. We could have some real fun.

Listen Bob! You seem like a nice guy, but you are too fast for me. A dinner, a swim, a drink does not constitute my leaving and going anywhere with you. I am an adult, and had my share of affairs. I make a living, teaching. I have my own home, car, and a dog named Bruiser. He is my protector.

Good golly, what did I say or do? I meant it only in the most gentlemanly way. To me a vacation means fun. I thought you felt the same way. I am so sorry if you thought I was wrong for wanting someone like you to be my guest, and have some real exciting fun. I know I do not speak the kings English, but believe me Jenny, I meant you no harm. Please do not let this little misunderstanding affect our dinner date tonight. See you at eight.

So here we are again, and nobody learned a thing about this object, I won. Very hush, hush. Yeah I bet it has some kind of value, or why would I have this feeling that someone is tailing me. Why so hush, hush. I have a feeling that my room has been searched. Everything was put back very neatly. Much to neatly, if you know what I mean. I am carrying the object with me night and day.

Hey Bob, you have a plan? You better even have a plan B, just in case.

I have a plan and a B plan. If nothing turns up in a few days, I am going to slip it to this broad I met. When she goes through customs, I will grab her, and give her a big kiss, and slight of hand I will drop it in her tote bag, she carries a few of them. We are having dinner together, tonight, and I will get her address and phone number, on the pretense of a date, when we get home. I may join her on the plane and try to retrieve it then. Everything depends on what this object really is. I am getting agidda from this thing. I want an end to it all. I feel like dumping it somewhere, but I will wait.

G-d Damn it, why is it, when you least want the phone to ring, it does. Here I am in the tub, trying to relax a little, and there is the phone. Oh well I might as well answer it. Hello, hello, yeah. Hi my gumba. You do! Tell me what is it worth. I hope at least, all this trouble I have gone through. What? There is an ad in the paper. What? They will pay what the pot was worth for its return. About $2000.00 It must be returned to its rightful owner. They gave a phone number, to call. They said it would be cash on delivery. Do you want the number.

Yeah, its worth a try. It is not the cash I was hoping for but it is worth a try to speak to them. Thanks my friend. I will see you tomorrow and pay you off. Good job my friend. I won't forget this. I had better get dressed to meet Jennifer. Then I will make the call to find out the true value of this damn thing I really want to get rid of it. Instead of feeling lucky for winning it, I feel like I am having a nightmare.

Well I am dressed and I will now make the phone call and see what I can find out.

Yeah this is the guy who won at poker. It is what? A stolen object from the king. King of who? Russia, The Czars collection. You were bringing it back when you got into the game. That's not my problem. I won it fair and square.

"Listen my man. I could have you wiped out in a second. Only that would do us no good as we don't know were the egg is".

Oh so that is what you call it. An egg. Tell me what is it worth to you?.

"Alright, enough already, I will give you the going rate for stolen property. Believe me man, you will not be able to pawn or sell the egg in the states. It is now being transmitted to the East, West, North America and South America that it is stolen property. Nobody in their right mind would touch it, for a million dollars. What good is it to you. You are not a collector of precious objects.

The moment you are successful in palming off this object we will kill you. Be smart and make a deal now".

Give me until tomorrow morning and I will let you know my decision.

Gosh you look beautiful Jennifer. You put your hair up. I like it like that at night. Lets dance. Oh you smell so good. You are a great dancer. Let me hold you a little closer. Getting hungry. Lets sit down and order. Anything you want sweetheart. Then I want to talk some serious talk. I need your advise in a very important matter. You are a school teacher and you know a lot. I want to know if you have any idea what the hell this is. (He unwrapped it and put it on the table.)

"Oh", she said, "This is an egg. It belongs in a set of eggs. They have numbers and usually those numbers tell a knowledgeable person, who they belong to. This type of egg was always found in the possession of the Czar of Russia or Kings and Queens. These jewels look authentic. My advise is to take it to someone who knows about these things. I am sure there will be an adequate reward for its return".

And yes, "how did it come into your possession? A long story! Well we have nothing but time. Spill the beans Mister. My advise is to return it to its rightful owner, before something terrible happens to you. I do not want any involvement in this matter. I am already getting shaky. I am scared to death.

I want to finish my dinner and leave. I do not think we are good for each other. Bob, I thank you for the dance, the food and the story. But I must leave now as I am leaving tomorrow, and I must pack".

Tomorrow that's a bit sudden. You said you had a few days left on your ticket.

Tonight, I got a phone call, that said, "If your smart you will leave and have nothing to do with the man you are having dinner with. He is a stupid fool. We will kill for the return of the object. The man who gambled it away is already dead. Be smart, Ms Commerand, and leave just as soon as possible. You don't want to be mixed up in this affair".

Gees, Jennifer, I am so sorry I got you involved in this. But I won it fair and square. It is mine. I am growing attached to it.

"Goodnight Bob, and goodbye. The man was right, you are stupid'.

* * *

Knock, knock, knock, knock.................

Bob, it is 3:00 a.m.. Bob what is the matter? Come in. Sit down. Tell me what happened.

They, two big lugs. They searched me, and when they couldn't find it, they beat the stuffing out of me. I think my jaw is busted.

Bob, you do realize you are going to have to go through customs. How do you expect to pull that one off. Listen to me. I am talking like a gun moll. I suppose you have a gun too.

Not any more. Those thugs took it off me.

If my brother, the assistant D.A. were here, he would give it to me good. How did you get involved? I thought you were the smart one. Seems like your friend is shrewder than you. Oh Bob, how could you do this to me? I wish I never met you. Wrong place, wrong time. There, I've cleaned you up. Please leave now. Don't you ever approach me again. Get out. Please leave.

* * *

Customs stop in N.Y.C. They took my tote bag and dumped it on the table and ask, "What is this a toy. Did you buy it in the Islands? Do you have a receipt for it"? I began to stammer as I recognized the egg. That no good drifter, that nightmare slipped it into my bag. Hoping they wouldn't bother a young woman. I was trying to get the words out when Bob Carlini showed up, with Bravado and smiles, saying, "Darling", I was wondering where I left that paper weight. Thanks guys it is a small gift for my daughter to put on her desk. I have the receipt in my luggage. Come on darling, lets get home already. I want to see the kids. I miss them something terrible. G-d Bless.

You hoodlum. You crook. You nasty man, get away from me. I never want to see you again. Wait till my brother hears this story. He'll have you arrested.

For what not paying a custom fee?

You think you know everything. They would confiscate the object to find out exactly what it is, and its worth. You are so dumb, I don't want to be near you. Get away from me you crook.

I love when you get so angry, your blue eyes become electric. I say lets go to your brother and tell him the whole story. Then hear what he has to say. I will be willing to abide by what he says. Oh by the way darling, I have fallen in love with you. You and I will marry some day, when you know me better. You see sweetheart, I am just a diamond in the rough. It will be up to you to polish me up a bit. See you around angel. Oh yes, hand over the egg.

Of all the nerve. The moxie. I wouldn't marry you if you were the last man on earth. You certainly have a high opinion of yourself, Mr. Bob Carlini. For someone as lowly as you, you think in great grandeur. I bet you haven't a dime of your own. Here is your egg, and If I were a gambling person, I would bet before long you will be wiping egg of your face.

Good golly molly, that female sets me on fire. That hair, the way she throws it around when she is so angry. Those eyes, the electricity that flares from them. Oh my, when she takes a deep breath her nipples stand out straight. I am sure she does not wear a bra. I will go mad if I do not straighten us out fast.

Do you have an appointment sir? What is your name? Mr. Commerand is at a meeting. I am not expecting him back today. Would you like to set up an appointment for some time this week? I will check his calendar. It is quite full at the moment. He has a full docket on Monday, Tuesday and Thursday. I could possibly fit you in on Wednesday at 2 p.m.. of next week.

Wow, that's what I call a busy hard working man.

That he is, between his court cases and people wanting to talk to him about their problems, he is here sometimes to late at night.

That's when I want to see him, late at night. After all the work is done I have a very personal matter to discuss with him. Please tell him my name. Please give him my card. Tell him I am very anxious to discuss this matter with him. Tell him Jenny will vouch for me. That's all. I will look forward to your call.

Yes, Miss Blackwell, I will be there tonight at 7 p.m. Thank you so much for your efforts on my behalf.

Well it is certainly about time I met you Dan. I have heard so much about you from Jennifer.

And I about you. Just exactly what do you want from me. My sister seems to think you have involved her in a shady piece of work. She is very upset. She has referred to you as a hoodlum and a second class citizen. Your business card says otherwise.

Dan, when I met your sister on vacation, I certainly gave her the impression that I was anything but an upstanding citizen. She was just a broad that I met and wanted to have a good time with her. Since then, I have fallen in love with Jen, but she will have nothing to do with me. Believe me Dan, I am a graduate of Princeton University. I have a masters degree in business and a jurist prudent degree. I run a very successful business. I happened to want to relax on vacation and joined a game of poker. That's when it all started. Someone put this object in the pot and I won it along with $2,000. Jenny seems to feel that it belongs to some king or royalty. She feels I have to return it. I feel I won it fair and square. It is mine. The man who gambled it, is dead. Both Jenny and I have had threatening calls and much intimidations. I guess it is the way I got it into the states, that is really bothering Jenny. Well it should. It was not very nice but I feel it is worth much more than they are offering for its return. As a business man, I want full value. What I want from you is to know whether it is truly mine, or must I really return it to the people who say it is rightfully theirs.

Well Bob, It will take some investigating to find out the truth. In the mean time what would you think of storing the object here. That would leave you clear should anyone decide to rough you up for it.

Good golly, do you think they have followed me to the states. I am beginning to become a little frightened. Please Dan, don't tell Jenny anything other than we have met and I will abide by your decision. Which I promise to do.