CHAPTER 1
My Story
It seems like everyone is looking for more abundance these days. Everyone is strapped. We are a society of instant gratification where we can have whatever we want now and pay for it later — until the bills come, and then we stress. There is no sacrifice first, where we save up, give up what we don't need right now, and pay the price beforehand. We are slaves to huge companies to whom we owe a lot of money with interest.
Before I learned about energy, that was my story too. I was a slave to debt. I had watched that movie called The Secret. I had read books about abundance, but I just couldn't do it. It didn't really work, at least not for me. And so I continued on, sick and stressing about money, always wondering where the next meal was going to come from. Then I realized there were pieces missing to that Law of Attraction stuff. I didn't have the whole picture. Over the next five years, I put together all the pieces and am very pleased to present them to you now, as I tell you my journey from chronic illness and poverty to amazing health, wealth, and the Fountain of Youth. And all of it comes from living the true Law of Attraction in its entirety.
Before I learned about healing, I was very sick and very strapped financially. I lived on a ranch, where my husband worked. We lived there because the house came with the job. But we had to pay for any upgrades ourselves, and we couldn't afford very much. So we had a few windows that were covered with plastic because the glass was missing, and the only heat in the house was a single wood-and coal-burning fireplace in the main living area. The winters were long, and the growing season was short. Temperatures could drop to twenty degrees below zero Fahrenheit and stay there for weeks. But it was perfect for cattle.
In the winter, we would wake up in temperatures around thirty to forty degrees inside the house. The water had to be left running at night so that it wouldn't freeze, and sometimes the toilet had a thin layer of ice on it in the morning. The boys would wake up cold and then go out and chop wood, and it would stay cold inside the house until we got a fire going. The way we stayed warm was with blankets, socks, and sweaters, and we made quilts. During the day, Jerry and my boys would come in from work, freezing, and stand in front of the fireplace. The rest of the room would be colder and colder depending on how near the fire someone was standing. So as the boys in front of the fire warmed up, they would move out a little, and the ones farther away would move into the warm spot. It was kind of comical watching them move in circles, depending on how warm their backside was. They would do that every time they came in to thaw out from working.
My annual income was zero. I had been running a little country store that was situated on the ranch and getting about three hundred bucks per month for doing that. Then the ranch owner told me that he was going to just give me a small percentage of the profit. As it turned out, he could no longer purchase fuel for the little gas pump that was the main feature drawing in the few customers who lived out in the middle of nowhere. The economy was getting worse, and any profit went to buy more groceries for the store. Pretty soon there was no store because it had to close. So we relied on Jerry's income, which was less than $10,000 per year before taxes, not including the house. It was not enough to support a family. I didn't know what I was going to do. I had scrimped, saved, and borrowed money from my mother to put myself through school.
For me, school had become necessary to save my life. Jerry had found a school for natural healing methods for me because I had been to doctors without being given any real hope. I had turned to natural methods once before, when my oldest daughter was four years old. Susan had severe kidney infections that wouldn't heal with antibiotics. The doctors did X-rays and ultrasounds and found one kidney had become enlarged and the other had withered into a small, useless knot. They recommended surgery for her, which we did follow through with, only to find out a few months later that her good kidney was now failing. I realized that without divine intervention, I was going to lose my daughter. So I got on my knees and begged for information, and I was shown two herbs: comfrey and garlic, which I was to blend together fresh in spring water and give her spoonfuls of this strong concoction every so many hours, along with a plain and simple diet with more fruit and vegetables and soaked grains and less meat and breads. It worked! The infection cleared, and the problem resolved as much as it could with one good kidney. Susan was going to be okay, but now my own health was failing.
One day, there was a robbery at the post office, which was in our little store. A Native American from the local Indian reservation had stolen money from the post office. After the theft, the tribal police came down to my store and told me that if I called the FBI, the Natives would come down and kill me. I called anyway, and long story short, people were fired that day, and others went to jail. My heart was too weak to take the strain, and I collapsed. Being so far from any help, Jerry was the only thing that saved my life that night. He had read about cayenne pepper in one of my school books and knew what to do. He has always been and forever will be my hero.
We had moved several times into different rentals for different jobs over the years before we landed on the ranch. I owed my mother money, which she had scrimped and saved up, and I felt like a heel asking for anything that she had worked so hard for. But the knowledge I gained from these schools for natural healing had saved my life, and I was healing. I am forever grateful and indebted to my mother for her sacrifices that she made in my behalf during that time.
When we ended up on the ranch, I was still weak and very anxious. Part of that anxiety was wondering how we were going to make ends meet and how I was ever going to pay back my debts. Just the stress of being so strapped caused anxiety all by itself. I had seen that movie called The Secret, and I had tried to manifest something good for my family, but it just wasn't working for me.
One night, I was thinking of all the wonderful things I could do, including paying off my debts, if I just had enough money. Buying just a few f lowers for my garden seemed extravagant and out of reach to me, let alone the fact that some of our children needed new shoes. I decided to write down my goal. I took a piece of paper, sat down on the rug, and wrote, "I make $100,000 a year." And to me, that was like the be-all and end-all. It was the impossible dream. Nobody made that much. And I didn't really believe I could, either. It was a wish, a hope, or just a small pinhole of a vision, and we had nothing. I didn't know how it would ever happen. But I stuck that little piece of paper on the corner of my bathroom mirror, and every time I looked in the mirror, I repeated it out loud to myself. It felt like a lie, but I kept at it. Pretty soon, I didn't really worry about whether I actually believed it or not, but I said it to myself anyway for a couple of months. And then I decided it was just an impossible dream and forgot about it. We had to move again. Jerry's job had ended, and he was laid off. Little did I know that in less than five years, my income would exceed that $100,000 mark, and I didn't win the lottery. I just did what I already knew and built on it. But before I did, I hit the very lowest point in my life.
Jerry told me that I might need to apply for state help to feed the kids. Welfare! To me, welfare meant that there was no more hope. I just groaned. I hated asking the state for help. I hated the feeling of having the government paw through every aspect of my life. I had done that before when I had lost my two little boys.
Years earlier, when I was pregnant with twin boys, one of the placentas for the twins started to detach, creating a subchorionic bleed. I realized I wasn't eating enough to support two babies and asked for extra help from the state. It was a hard thing to do, and although it made a dent in my pride, I wanted those two little boys more than anything else. It wasn't to be, though, and almost five months into the pregnancy, the twins were stillborn. It was a hard blow, and I decided that if I had just put as much effort into a real job as I did telling the state every aspect of my life, and doing all that paperwork, then I could be rich.
When things got to that point and everything felt completely hopeless, I got down on my knees and prayed for help. I just cried and prayed because the road looked way too hard anymore, and I didn't know what to do. I felt like a total failure at life. My health was still poor, I was having such bad anxiety that I started to understand how suicide could look like an answer, and I was wondering why I had put forth so much effort to stay alive if life was going to be like this. I was as good as homeless, and I could barely feed my family. But after all the effort I had put forth for my children, I couldn't give up. Leaving my children alone in the world would be like feeding kittens to a wolf.
I believe in the power of prayer, and so I prayed. And the answer came in a most unusual way. A friend gave me a book about tapping EFT energy, cowritten by Gary Craig. EFT stands for emotional freedom techniques. I had never heard of anything like it before. It looked like you just tapped certain areas of your body while saying that you loved yourself, and all your problems just magically went away, just like that. My first thought was sarcasm: "Holy cow! That's just what I needed: a little magic" (and I don't believe in magic). But I was ready to try anything, and emotional freedom sounded good, so I read it and realized that this was science, and it worked by tapping energy meridians, according to ancient Chinese knowledge. I was very intrigued and learned how to do it, and it helped me feel a little better in my health. It was also my introduction into energy medicine. I learned how frequency was tangible measurable energy that could actually heal and even create. But the anxiety was still overwhelming, and I still didn't have any money.
The anxiety I was experiencing at that point in my life was so overwhelming that I couldn't be alone. I couldn't leave my house, I couldn't drive, and I was still very tired all of the time. Like I said, it was the lowest point of my life. I watched the Gary Craig videos and saw a doctor named Stephen Daniel do something I had never seen before. Through muscle testing, he found information that healed people. He exuded a compassion for people that was rare, and I was drawn by that energy. There were a lot of healers on the video that day, but he stood out. I didn't know it at the time, but Dr. Daniel had been through his own hell on earth, living in a disastrous marriage, with a migraine that had lasted for seven years. He was a psychologist who had learned that you could help people much faster by dialoguing with their body through muscle testing, instead of conventional counseling. He could find emotions and the underlying beliefs and perceptions that drove them by asking the body's unconscious for information.
The body can't lie. It is built in the image of God, and God is truth. So I can hold out my arm and speak truth, and the muscle will hold strong when given resistance by pushing down. If I hold out my arm and speak a lie, the muscle loses its strength and goes weak. So it works in binary, like a computer. You can ask the body yes-and-no questions by making the question into a statement, such as "My body is thirsty"; a strong muscle would signify that was true and a weak muscle would signify it was not. Dr. Daniel's experiences had given him a compassion for those who were suffering, as he had suffered, and it was very apparent, even on the video, how much he cared. I was intrigued and felt strongly compelled to find out more. In my gut, I knew that he had something that I needed. I'm sure that this was a higher power at work because I had asked God for help, and this was my answer.
I inquired into Dr. Daniel's Quantum Techniques method of healing and received a twenty-minute free consultation to try it after purchasing something from his website. If I hadn't been offered twenty minutes free, I would have passed it by because I really couldn't afford the money. I found that Beth Daniel had the same compassion that Stephen had. She truly cared whether I got well or not. I had traveled a long, hard road alone to get as far as I had with my health, and it felt like I could put down my worries and rest. I was so weary.
Now I can see that my own troubled path was a blessing for the same reason. Compassion comes with suffering and brings you an understanding of what another being is going through. Your heart goes out to those who suffer, and you really do care.
Jerry found another job at that point, and he took a second job so that we could afford the Quantum Techniques sessions. My health started to get better, and I was dealing with the anxiety better; I asked for help with whatever was blocking my ability to have abundance, so we worked on that, along with my other healing work, and things started to change.
As I went through the process of healing energetically, I became conscious of many things that I didn't know about myself. I found out why I was anxious and why I thought the way I did, even about my health and finances. I realized that what you believe about yourself is the life you live. I found by muscle testing that I viewed the world as a dangerous and unfriendly place. I felt angry and was afraid of people in my past and present. There were people in my life from the time that I was very young who were hostile to me and my siblings. The things that happened, and the perceptions and beliefs I took on from those times, were now submerged in my unconscious and were manifesting as negative emotions, victimhood, illness, and anxiety. I had some good times for sure through my life, but because the unconscious views everything as the present moment, the past was like a dark threat hanging over me.
By muscle testing, I found that I believed I was worthless and did not deserve to have anything. Echoes of constantly being called a "stupid idiot," by a caretaker who I was sure hated me, sifted up from my past. I felt too worthless to amount to anything; I thought I deserved what I got and God didn't care. I knew my parents loved me. They were the common Depression-era parents. Survival was more important than coddling children, and military style was the norm. Somewhere along the way, I took in the belief that if things weren't perfect, God would come after me, and bad things would happen, and I was now conveying this message to my own children.
There were many other things that I unconsciously drew to myself because I saw myself as a victim; all my problems were somebody else's fault. If I felt bad, it was because nobody did anything to help me be happy. You can imagine that the frequency I resonated with when I dropped off into these low negative times. It was becoming obvious to me why I sat in utter poverty.
It was out of these troubled ashes that my Phoenix arose when I finally found Quantum Techniques. I was very lucky to marry a kind and gentle man after I finally grew up. I couldn't believe anyone would want to marry the likes of me. I'm sure I looked like a bunch of trouble to Jerry, but he loved me, and his love looked like the sunrise to me.
My illness had put me on this quest to find answers, and so even the miserable experiences in my life were a blessing in disguise because without those experiences, I wouldn't be where I am today. It was these experiences that allowed me to learn the things I did, that brought my income from zero to more than $150,000 per year in less than five years — and my health from frail to fabulous.
What I learned is that financial success, or any success in your life — even success with your health — is conscious intention or conscious creation. You are the creator of your own destiny. I had thought of myself as a victim for all of those years. But even then, I had a choice. I also learned that I had to find anything that was blocking my conscious intention to create and get rid of it. You act according to what you believe. It's true.
So with the new things I learned in Quantum Techniques, I changed any belief that was blocking me from achieving what I intended to create. I was not a victim of circumstance anymore. I couldn't change anyone else, but I could change me, and all that was standing in the way was me, just me and my blocking beliefs, which I could easily pinpoint by muscle testing.
The day I taped that little piece of paper to my mirror saying "I make $100,000 per year" was a starting place for me of conscious creation for my future. If I look back at myself then, I had no clue that I would actually be where I am today. And I had all kinds of reasons why I couldn't, shouldn't, or wouldn't be here right now. But when you get there, it won't be luck. You will know exactly how you got there. Because you did what it took. In other words, you paid the price.