Tarell’s story is one that couldn’t have stayed hidden. He was both humbled in the sight of God through his innocence and abused in the blindness of many in their own ignorance. This story will evoke emotions ranging from sadness to joy, while making you laugh in between. In a world where movies and literature reign supreme, Blind Innocence offers a unique story that has yet to be portrayed, offering a refreshingly, new journey through the life of a troubled adolescent. Tarell is mentally challenged and has been through a lot in his young life, suffering abuse from both his biological mother and his adoptive mother, women in general, and society. Just when it appears as though things are finally starting to look up for Tarell, who after meeting his biological family, all hell breaks loose. What started out as a dream quickly becomes reality, and soon, it all turns out to be a nightmare.Then he meets Debbie, a young girl who, among all the other women he came across, has a heart filled with compassion and sorrow after hearing his story. Debbie talks her mother into taking in the homeless Tarell, but more drama erupts when Debbie’s mother, a conniving, Christian woman, uses his mental disability against him in order to pacify her insecurities, causing him to endure even more mental and emotional damage. But as they say, “What doesn’t break you will only make you strong.”Blind Innocence shares a poignant glimpse into one man’s life as he faces seemingly insurmountable odds and slowly tries to create a meaningful life. After everything Tarell has been through, will he be broken, or arise, victorious and strong?

Kirkus Review

Jones’ debut coming-of-age novel chronicles a neglected and abused young man’s quest to not only survive, but also thrive. Jones wrote the novel as a source of inspiration, not as entertainment. This volume, which will be followed by a sequel, ends with the author’s prayer, whose words reflect the philosophy of her novel: “Lord….Your words have always been said to me that you would work it out, and not to forget to practice patience and let your will play out.” Moving, if not always graceful, inspirational fiction.

US Review of Books

Spotlighting the plight of an educable mentally retarded child of a single, drug-addicted teenage mother, the author has provided a window into the world of mental disabilities and the concomitant poverty and abuse such a child can face. The theme of human depravity and aggression against the weak is made quite viscerally manifest. The characterizations and plot are gripping and realistic.

Foreword’s Clarion Review

A. Adams Jones’s heart-wrenching novel Blind Innocence offers insights into the often tragic trials of living with a mental disability. Blind Innocence is a harrowing and hopeful novel that raises awareness about living with disabilities through the dynamic characterizations of its leading cast. The story centers on Tarell, who is born with mental disabilities as a result of his mother Monique’s crack addiction. Though he has the mental capacity of a sixth grader, Tarell learns to live self-sufficiently, unshakable in his love for the joys of life, and with the help of his faith, forgiving those around him, no matter their past corruptions. A story of strength of faith, forgiveness, and love. It imparts a keen sense of melancholy and pain. Counteracted with the power of faith and love, such elements result in a fresh take on the genre.  

Blueink Review

This story is well thought out, compelling, and the characters are generally believable. Blind Innocence will elicit reader sympathy, and the message of God’s saving grace will no doubt resonate with fans of the Christian genre.

Blind Innocence

By A. Adams Jones

iUniverse, Inc.

Copyright © 2012 A. Adams Jones
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4759-0154-2

Chapter One

It was a miracle that Tarell Johnson was even born on July 22, 1984 to 19-year-old Monique Johnson and 20-year-old Paul Wright. Monique was young, unstable, and on crack, which she had been smoking since she was 17.

At 5'6 and 135 pounds, light pecan complexion, almond-shaped eyes with thick dark eyebrows and long wavy jet-black hair, Monique was considered very pretty. In fact, a "bombshell" is what the guys in her high school called her. Monique was very popular throughout high school and was voted most popular among her peers. She was funny, down to earth, outspoken, crazy, and had a great sense of humor. Aside from being very pretty, she was also considered one of the best-dressed females in her school. She had a lot of friends and was liked by many. As popular as Monique was, one thing that made her stand out even more than her looks was the fact that she didn't look down on people, no matter who you were. She didn't care whether you were popular or not or wore the same nice clothes she wore. If you wanted to be her friend, she was willing to become one. However, if you rubbed her the wrong way or violated her in anyway, she would become your worst nightmare. She wasn't the type of female that took any crap from anyone; she was tough and didn't back down.

Paul was also very popular. He was a handsome, all-star football player for the high school team. He was brown skinned, six feet tall, and 170 pounds with a nice broad build. Paul was born to be an athlete and had big dreams for his future. He would tell Monique how he was going to one day make it to the pros, marry her, and take care of her. He was laid back and was the total opposite from Monique. Monique loved to hang out and party, but Paul would rather watch a good movie at home or a theater.

He would, however, accompany Monique from time to time when she partied. Paul had a saying: "A person didn't have to go along to get along." He didn't agree with a lot of things Monique did, but he loved her, and for that reason, he could still get along with her. They were like night and day, but they loved each other.

Chapter Two

Monique's experience with crack didn't get out of control until after she had Tarell. Although she had experienced crack on numerous occasions, she also sold crack for one of the neighborhood drug dealers until she got strung out and no one would put any more drugs in her hands. But because she was so good at hustling, she had many different ways of getting money. Monique was an undercover smoker; that's what they called `em, because for a while she was able to hide her addiction. She kept herself together and didn't let her appearance go. But being undercover only lasted for a moment until her cover was blown. No undercover likes to smoke alone; there will always be at least one person smoking with you, and that very person will be the one to blow your cover.

Even though Monique still looked good and kept things together for a while, she was still looked upon as an undercover. Monique's response was typical, "Undercover? I don't think so."

As time went on and crack got the best of her, Monique's cover was not only blown, but what was underneath now came to the surface. Family members tried to help Monique, but as much as they tried, they got nowhere, so they eventually left her alone. She left her mother's house and ran the streets.

Paul and Monique's relationship ended before Tarell was born. Paul was no saint, but he managed to keep himself together even after Monique drew him into smoking crack. He continued to work his job down at the local paper factory that an agency had got for him. Paul even applied for college after graduating high school but didn't follow through. Although Monique's life had already taken a turn for the worst before she learned she was pregnant, an abortion was not an option; she refused to consider such a thing. When Paul suggested it, she flipped out on him. At the time of the argument between her and Paul, Monique had already left her mother's house and lived from crack house to crack house, hanging out in the streets all night, hustling and doing whatever she had to do to make a dollar.

"Nigga, I know you ain't even trynna tell me to get rid of my baby." Monique spat.

"That's exactly what I'm telling you," Paul said. "You're two and a half months pregnant; you don't need no baby. You don't even have a place to live, out here running the streets and getting high. What happened to you? You had so much going for yourself, Mo."

"And I still do," returned Monique.

"And don't stand here and lecture me, Paul. You ain't no saint, and you damn sure ain't better than me with your little factory job."

"Mo, I'm not gonna stand here and argue with you. All I'm saying is that you really need to consider getting an abortion. Neither one of us is ready to take on a child," Paul pleaded. "I'll be pursuing my college career again in a couple of months and I've already submitted my applications for some out of state colleges, so I'll be gone for at least four years."

"Go ahead! Me and my baby will be just fine," Monique said as she walked away.

Paul did just that. Within three months, he left for college and wondered whether the baby she was carrying was really even his.

Chapter Three

Even though Monique was on drugs and pregnant, it didn't stop guys that knew her from trying to get with her. These were guys that tried to get with her or wished they could have her during the time she wasn't on crack but couldn't. They felt that now was their opportunity, and all Monique would do is play them for their money by using her street game. She had the gift of gab and could talk her way into or out of anything. Some people viewed her as a con artist. She was so smooth; people didn't even realize they were being conned, even after they were conned and told that she was a con artist, they still didn't believe it.

When it was time to give birth to her baby, she was on the block with some of the other hustlers, standing around talking and selling crack. Suddenly, she began to feel pains in her stomach. She flagged down a cab and headed to Jamaica Hospital. This wasn't the closest hospital, but she didn't care much for the neighborhood one. Since she was into the street life, Monique didn't keep a lot of her scheduled doctor appointments. She would always have something to do in the streets that she felt was much more important than sitting in some doctor's office for hours waiting to be seen. Little did she know, had she kept those appointments, they could have possibly prevented the complications that lay ahead. Monique arrived at the hospital, huffing and puffing as her contractions came every three to four minutes.

"Can somebody help me? I'm having a baby!" she yelled.

A nurse responded from behind her desk. "Someone will be with you in a moment, so please take a seat."

Another contraction came, and Monique yelled, "I'm in labor and you're telling me to take a seat? No, I'm not taking no seat. If you don't get a doctor out here—"

Monique suddenly stopped, calmed herself down, and said, "Look, this baby is ready to come."

She knew that if she kept yelling, there might be a chance that the nurse would delay her further.

The nurse got up and said, "Follow me," and led Monique to one of the examination rooms in the back.

"Do you think you can manage to get undressed and put this gown on?"

"Yes," Monique answered, doubled over and holding her stomach.

While handing Monique the gown, the nurse asked, "Is this your first baby?"

"Yes it is."

"Oh, I see. Well, someone will be in to get some insurance information from you, and a doctor will be in shortly to examine you."

"Okay," Monique said as the nurse left the room.

Every time a contraction came on, Monique would let out a yell. "Ohhh my God, please somebody get this baby out of me!"

After ten minutes of being in the room, a woman came in and said, "Hi, my name is Linda and I'm here to collect some insurance information from you. I need you to tell me your full name."

Through hard breathing, Monique answered, "Monique Johnson is my name."

"How old are you?"

"Nineteen."

"What is your full address?"

"567 Beach 19th, Street, Far Rockaway."

"Okay," Linda said as she wrote down each response in her notepad and asked, "What kind of insurance do you—"

"Ooooh, God, please help me!" Monique interrupted as another contraction came.

"Could you please do this later? And where's the doctor?" Monique asked, holding onto the railing for dear life.

In that moment two doctors walked into the room.

"We were just finishing up," Linda informed the doctors. "Monique, I just need to know the name of your insurance company to put in the computer. I can get whatever else I need a little later," she added.

"I have State Insurance," Monique said. "My insurance is through the state welfare."

"Okay. Thank you, Monique, I'm just gonna need the card if you have it. I can come back for it."

"Yeah, I have it in my pocketbook." Monique pulled out the card and handed it to Linda.

"Okay, thanks; I'll just run a copy and bring it back."

"Hi Monique, I'm Doctor Paterson and this is Doctor Egan. We just need to examine you to see how many centimeters you are."

After a brief examination, Dr. Paterson said that Monique was three centimeters. Then he added, "A nurse will be in the room shortly to connect you to a monitor so that we can keep track of your heart rate, and we also need to get an IV going. We'll come in from time to time to examine you and see how much you're dilating."

At that time, another contraction came and Monique yelled.

"Aaaahh!"

"You're having another contraction, just relax," the doctor said.

"Please," Monique said, "you have to get this baby out of me! Why is it taking so long?"

"Your contractions seem to be coming maybe four to five minutes apart, but your water hasn't broken yet. You only arrived thirty minutes ago, from my understanding," the doctor said.

"Yeah, but thirty minutes is a long time when the contractions keeps coming so fast," Monique said.

"You're three centimeters and you have to dilate ten centimeters before the baby can pass through the cervix."

"Oh my God! How long is that gonna take?" Monique cried.

"I don't have the answer to that," the doctor answered. "Hopefully not too long, because I know you're in pain."

"Well, could you at least give me something for the pain?" Monique asked as another contraction came.

As the doctor was walking out of the room, he turned and said, "Let's just wait and see what happens. If I give you pain medicine, it will numb you and you won't be able to push. Just take deep breaths and try to relax when you feel the contractions coming on."

Relax? Monique thought to herself. I'm lying here in all this pain and he's telling me to relax?

Although Monique was thinking those words, she knew better than to say them out loud because the doctor was the last person she wanted to make her enemy. Both her life and her baby's life were in the doctor's hands.

Just as the doctors left the room, the nurse came back to start the machines to monitor Monique's heart rate and contractions and start her IV. After an hour of contractions, the doctors examined Monique again and told her that she was still three centimeters.

"What?! After all this time and I'm still three centimeters?" she cried. "Oh God, and I have to get to ten before the baby can come," she sobbed.

Monique held onto the bed railing, breathed hard and cried out, "Oh my God! This is my word; I'm not having no more kids!"

Chapter Four

No one in Monique's family knew that she was in the hospital having a baby, although some of her immediate family knew she was pregnant. Her siblings saw her out on the block from time to time, and her mother had heard about it. Monique didn't go around her family much.

Monique's siblings treated her like the black sheep of the family, mostly because she was the only one that was in the streets and on drugs. Even though Monique's siblings looked down on her, her mother still loved her and treated all of her children just the same.

After ten hours of labor, Monique had only reached four centimeters. With her contractions coming on faster and Monique dilating very slowly, the baby started losing oxygen, so the doctors decided that they needed to perform an emergency C-section.

Because the medical staff was not prepared for this, it took another two hours to set up an operating room for the surgery. Even still, it would be a while before they could give Monique anything for the pain. Without question, the baby's life was in danger.

While in the delivery room as they began to perform the surgery, they first gave Monique a needle in her spine, a procedure they called a spinal tap. The needle they injected was so painful that it took five doctors to hold Monique down as she cried loud enough for those outside of the operating room to hear. The thing was, this was a very sensitive procedure. The outcome could very well cause an individual to be paralyzed if not done carefully, which meant the patient needed to keep very still.

After nine more hours in labor, Monique finally had her baby boy. The nurse cleaned him and handed him to her, and Monique held him in her arms, overjoyed. She looked at him, smiled and said, "Hi Tarell" as if she had already picked the name out while waiting for him to be born. She was very tired after so many hours of labor, but the smile remained on her face as she gave him back to the nurse.

The nurse took Monique to the room where she would stay for the remainder of her time in the hospital.

After examining the baby and taking all the required tests on him, they found crack in his system, contracted through Monique's drug use. However, back in those days, they didn't make a big deal out of it. Mothers that were on drugs were able to take their babies home with them, as there were no government laws that prevented mothers on drugs from taking their baby from the hospital. It didn't matter whether the mother had a place for the baby to live or not. Giving the hospital an address was mainly for insurance purposes to ensure they were paid, and if for some reason they weren't, they would have a lead on how to find delinquent patients.

After three days, Monique was ready to leave the hospital, so she made a call to Buddy, a friend of hers who also sold drugs.

"Hi Buddy; it's me, Monique. I need you to come pick my baby and me up from Jamaica Hospital. I also need you to pick up an outfit for the baby."

"Alright," Buddy said.

Monique had been a good friend of his for many years; they grew up in the same neighborhood. Although Buddy would dip and dab with the drugs from time to time, he was more into his money.

"Oh yeah, I also need you to pick up a car seat for the baby because you know these people ain't letting me take this baby outta here without one," Monique added as she half laughed.

"Don't worry, I got you. I can't wait to see little Tarell, but you owe me, Monique."

"Yeah, I'll let you be his godfather." Monique chuckled.

Buddy arrived at the hospital with a few bags of baby clothes and the car seat already secured in the back seat of the car. Monique was standing in the lobby looking out the big glass window with Tarell in her arms as one of the floor nurses accompanied her.

Buddy got out the car to help Monique as he smiled at Tarell.

"Wassup little man? Say hi to your godfather," Buddy said as he strapped Tarell into the car seat. He helped Monique into the car and drove away.

Monique stayed in one of the crack houses that she frequented. It was located in one of the neighborhood project buildings. As she arrived with Tarell, her home girl Stephanie yelled from the first floor apartment window.

"Hey Mo! Let me see the baby!" She made her way to the front door.

"Ooooh look at him. He's so handsome. He looks just like you," Stephanie said while reaching for him.

"Yeah he does, don't he? He's my little man," Monique smiled and handed Tarell to Stephanie.

"So how you feeling Mo? You been at the hospital for like five days."

"Tired, girl," Monique answered as she walked into the apartment living room to sit down.

"That's probably the most you've rested or laid up in years," Stephanie said as she followed Monique into the living room and sat down beside her.

"Oh you got jokes huh? I guess having this baby took a lot outta my behind. Anybody in the back room?" Monique asked Stephanie.

(Continues...)

Excerpted from Blind Innocenceby A. Adams Jones Copyright © 2012 by A. Adams Jones. Excerpted by permission of iUniverse, Inc.. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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