CHAPTER 1

Can We Live a Positive Life?

Can we live a positive life? Yes we can. Some ask me this even as theyexperience turmoil, gossip, and confusion. We must strive to live joyful,prosperous, successful lives—but, of course, it's up to you. You can eitherchoose to be a caterpillar or rise above all the foolishness and strive to bea butterfly. I'm not saying that in the caterpillar stage of our lives it is easy.Life is not easy. We all make mistakes, but the learning process makes usstronger. We don't become that beautiful butterfly until we have gonethrough something, and that's what makes us humble and grateful. Weall deserve to have a better life and good relationships and to live joyfully.We must pull each other up in our communities to be better humanbeings so that we all can benefit from everyone doing good. If we all aredoing our best, we can help others do their best. The world would be abetter place if we all were butterflies. So, don't stay a caterpillar; growwith me. The spiritual meaning of butterfly is an amazing transformationthat takes place through Christ's redemption and regeneration whenwe are born again and become a new creation. "Therefore if anyoneis in Christ, he is a new creation; the old is gone, the new has come!"(2 Corinthians 5:17 NIV).

The past was my past, but now I want a better future. I will livemy life for what it is rather than regretting it for what it is not.Living and loving life.

It's easy to have a bad life, but you should strive harder to havea good life.

Even with all the ups and downs in life, always stay positive.

To go from a caterpillar to a butterfly is a blessing, and whodoes not want to grow better in life and have the ability to fly?God created this creature just like He created you. God has theperfect plan, and it is up to us to achieve it.

—Doll

CHAPTER 2

Grateful

Woke up saying, "Thank you, God," for everything.
I woke up
The sunshine, even the rain
Water
Good health
My clothes
Shoes
My pets
Lights
Furniture
A job
Coworkers
Family
Friends
Money
Trees
Food to eat
Everything I come in contact with, I say, "Thank you, God;
I'm so grateful!"

Thank God for Jesus!

I am so grateful to be a hairstylist and to have traveled to some of the placesin the world I have always dreamed of. Never in my wildest dreams wouldI have imagined riding a camel in Morocco in North Africa, seeing St.Petersburg Palace in Russia, being able to visit Iguazu Falls in Argentina,or seeing the flamenco dancers in Spain. I took a helicopter ride throughthe glaciers and went dogsledding in Alaska. I climbed in Ocho Rios inJamaica. I even went to an ostrich farm in Curaçao, where I rode an ostrichthat was running 50 mph.

My mom had passed away, so she was not alive to see history beingmade—the first black president, President Barack Obama. At theinauguration, I was in the crowd of excited, happy people who came fromall over the world. I must say that was one of the best days of my life. I wasso grateful to be able to vote and make a difference!

I am also so grateful to give back to the American Cancer Society. Mysalon collects wigs, hats, and scarves to make a difference in someone's life.I also walked for the All Shades of Pink Foundation, which helps men andwomen who are diagnosed with breast cancer. I am so grateful to be ableto give back; being grateful means not just to receive but also to give.

CHAPTER 3

Back in the Day

When I was young, my mother had me in dance classes, modeling school,and singing lessons. I was always busy in different activities because mymom said I had a lot of energy and needed to put it to use doing positivethings. When I became a teenager, my family had a band. I enjoyed beinga part of that. But going out to the go-go and clubs was fun for me at thattime. Jumping on stage, dancing, and even rapping gave me a chance toperform with the great, talented Chuck Brown. I was so honored to havethat opportunity to be a part of go-go history. I enjoyed being onstage atthe Capital Center to perform in front of thousands of people. I rememberChuck Brown chanting the words, "Whatever you do, big or small, do itwell, or don't do it at all." I have also worked with Syke Dyke, a great andtalented musician and producer from Trouble Funk who introduced meto Tee-Bone, who was a percussionist who trained me on the roller tons.

I went on to put out records. Some people said I was the first girl to dogo-go. My name back in the day was Doll Baby. I had a song out entitled"So Delicious." I wrote plenty of songs and worked with lots of talentedpeople in Washington, DC. I had a video that was on BET Home Jams.

I always loved modeling, and someone introduced me to Phil Collins.They said that he was a great photographer, and I felt really relaxed aroundhim. I have been introduced to several photographers, and some mademe feel uncomfortable when I was around them. When my mother wasyounger in the modeling industry, she had been raped by a photographer.I didn't want to be alone with a photographer without someone beingthere with me.

But the first time I did a shoot for Mr. Collins, I saw how professionaland pleasant he was. The very first photo shoot we did was when I wasBeauty of the Week in Jet magazine, December 4, 1989. I was a star for aweek, and I signed so many copies of Jet. I saw my picture in barbershops,and I even got calls to visit the radio station. Because I had appeared inJet, I was on the Donnie Simpson show when he was at the WPGC radiostation. Also, I was in Jet on September 1, 1997; January 11, 1999; andDecember 27, 1999 (when I brought in the millennium New Year 2000).Now, as the four-time Jet Beauty of the Week, I had broken the record.After that I did several swimsuit calendars and other publications. I wenton to cohost and host local television shows. Then I took classes at CTV76 and became a certified producer.

I created Doll's Beauty Show back in 2000. While doing my show, I metpositive people doing great things in our community. My cousin RichardTyson was the videographer. He remembers my very first show when noneof my guests showed up. I started crying and then wiped my tears andwent out in the street and started interviewing people. The show turnedout great after all. In the beginning days of Doll's Beauty Show, I used toedit and review all the shows until it became too much for me. I was tryingto do everything, when I really needed to leave that to those who werebetter at those tasks. Michael Ray and Shelby Cox helped me out on a lotof the shows, and so did some of the students at CTV. We did over onehundred shows, including shows on CTV (channel 76) and DCTV. Also,I received over ten awards—some from CTV and DCTV.

While using all the gifts that God has given me, it helped me fulfill lots ofmy dreams. I jumped out of a plane at eleven thousand feet, was a clownin a circus, and rode an ostrich on the island of Curaçao. I even ate iguanasoup. What I do for television! I watched Oprah Winfrey at 4:00 p.m.every day for years behind the chair. I always wanted to meet her or evenproduce a show for her. My mother always said pick the best role model,and I did—Oprah Winfrey. She had that go-get-it attitude, and if I hadto look up to anyone, my choice would be the Queen of the Talk Show.Now she is the owner of the network OWN. She is a true example of howhard work does pay off.

Also, I looked up to Dorothy Height. She was the "Queen" of the civilrights movement. She sat onstage as Martin Luther King Jr. delivered his"I Have a Dream" speech, and she led the National Council for NegroWomen for well over fifty years. I had the honor to have talked with herseveral times. I took a picture with her at her birthday party. It was amazingto be in the presence of a woman with style and class. I admired her fightfor equal rights, and I would go every year to the black family reunionwhere I would see her. To be in her presence was an honor. Dorothy wasa beautiful butterfly, and she will always be with me in my heart, forevermissed.

Without community service, we would not have a strongquality of life. It's important to the person who serves as wellas the recipient. It's the way in which we ourselves grow anddevelop.

—Dorothy Height (March 24, 1912-April 20, 2010)

Never lose sight of your dream; work hard but never give up.

—Doll

Whatever you do, big or small, do it well, or don't do it at all.

—Chuck Brown

I believe you should use your ego for a higher good.

—Oprah Winfrey

CHAPTER 4

Love What I Do

I love what I do so much! And it's not about the money. I have been doingpublic access television for over ten years—my show's name is Doll'sBeauty Show. I filmed over one hundred shows for free. Even though CTV,channel 76, supplied me with their equipment, I had my own lights andcamera. I went to CTV for classes and became a certified producer.

On my shows I had poets, fashion designers, entertainers, and evencelebrities. What I admired most were my guests who were everyday,hardworking people in the community giving back. Those shows were sofulfilling and enjoyable. I would be invited to fashion shows where kidsand adults would give to a foundation. I featured a schoolteacher whoraised money for a student who could not pay her hospital bills so that wecould help her mother. My show gave people in the community a way tobe seen and heard. I loved the shows that featured people going through adevastating time in their life who just wanted to share their story to helpsomeone else not give up hope.

I even traveled with my camera on vacation so people could see the worldwith me. I interviewed a trainer on exercise, and he said, "Just get up andget moving!" Like I always say, don't talk about it, be about it. Go get yourdream! When you love what you do, it's not work—it's fun and exciting,and you have the passion and happiness you want to do it all day andnight. During Doll's Beauty Show I met some of the most driven people inthe community who worked regular jobs but found the time to do whatthey love.

You must listen to your heart and when your spirit says move, move! Followyour passion and do it in such a way that you can't stop until you finishwith great results. Love your dream. Love God, and He will help you leadthe way. You must stay positive, don't doubt, remain fearless, and press on.Do everything with love. Don't listen to the dream crushers. Stay focusedon the end result, and remember: love what you do.

If you can't figure out your purpose, figure out your passion.For your passion will lead you right into your purpose.

—Bishop T. D. Jakes

When you can do something without getting paid, you love it.

—Doll

It doesn't matter who you are, where you come from; the abilityto triumph begins with you, always.

What God intended for you goes far beyond anything you canimagine.

—Oprah Winfrey

Love what you do.

—Doll

CHAPTER 5

Miss Too-Blessed-to-Be-Stressed

Miss Too-Blessed-to-Be-Stressed came in the shop today, sad becauseher man has been cheating on her. They had planned to get married.He packed up and left her. He has no job and he has four babies by fourdifferent baby mamas. I never knew what she saw in him but it was noneof my business. Let me start by saying the apartment she lives in is hers;she has a college degree and she has a good job. The car he was drivingwas hers. But she is crying, all upset over this guy who has a track recordfor hit 'em and quit 'em.

"But he loves me. Why is he leaving me?" she asks, crying out loud while I'mdoing her hair. "What am I going to do without him? I can't live withouthim." She has everything in life going for her. But she wants to stress overthe good-for-nothing boyfriend. "This is it! It is really over this time."

I said, "Yeah right, you said that before." She always lets him right back inher apartment. Miss Too-Blessed-to-Be-Stressed never learns.

Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift youhigher.

—Oprah Winfrey

Nothing can dim the light which shines from within.

—Maya Angelou

God is my provider, not man.

—Doll

CHAPTER 6

Too Blessed to Be Stressed

Let me start by saying that I have been lied on, and I have been cussedout by someone who was supposed to be my friend who stole my clothes,jewelry, television set, and all my personal things. I've been cheated on andtotally disrespected. I have had so many bills and credit card bills—therewere times when I did not know how I was going to pay the mortgage. Iremember sitting up crying all night long because I thought I was goingto lose everything and be homeless. I would work, work, work, and stillnot have enough.

But, the biggest pain was to see my mother sick and suddenly pass away.That was one of the most devastating things to happen to me in my life.My mother and I were so close, and I loved her sooooo much! The Biblesays to honor thy mother and father, and I did. I gave her all the love Ihad, and I gave her flowers while she was living. But the day came whenshe had to go be with the Lord. I knew God was in control.

So, when clients come in and start telling me their stories of how bad lifeis, I have to share some of my hard times. But I tell them this too shallpass. There is never a time that I can remember that I handled anythingon my own. I always prayed about it and believed in God. I believe instaying positive and looking for the good in all the hurt and pain. I learnto let go and let God. I know deep down inside it is going to be all right.So, when you are going through something, meditate on the Word: "Noweapon that is formed against thee shall prosper" (Isaiah 54:17 KJV).Keep reminding yourself that you are a victor not a victim. Knowing allthe devil took from me, God will give me back and more. So I can saythis to you because I can relate. You're too blessed to be stressed. Keepyour head up, keep smiling. Don't look at the bad situation. Just know inyour heart that the hurt and pain will change. Sometimes we have to gothrough tough times to make us stronger and to bring us closer to God.Thank God for the hard times too, because they make us appreciate whatwe have, and they will make us better people.

No one but you are responsible for your own life.

—Oprah Winfrey

Even after a storm, the sun always has to shine.

—Doll

Stress is caused by being here but wanting to be there.

—Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now

I-Survived-It Checklist

• Financial hardships

• Being cheated on

• Sickness

• Being lied to

• Losing a loved one

• A car crash

• Mistreatment

• Losing a pet

• Losing a job

• Hurt

• Disappointment

• Disrespect

If I survived it, you can too! God may not come when you want him to,but he's right on time. You're too blessed to be stressed!

CHAPTER 7

I Live by Faith

I must start by saying I live by faith. When I go to work, I don't knowif a client is going to walk through the door. Some days I have no onescheduled on my appointment book. Then ten clients come walkingthrough the door. I can honestly say I rely on my faith in God to bringclients to me. On a spiritual level, we must believe and trust in God.Sometimes we worry over things that will never happen. But I rememberwhen I bought my home, I said, "What if I lose my job or what if I getsick? But even if that happens, I have faith that God will make a way." Youmust have positive thoughts and put God's trust in everything.

Have you ever driven through a bad storm and could not see what wasin front of you, but you trusted you could get home safe, and you did?You had faith. Your strong faith will see you through life's storms. Whensomeone says, "Do you think I will make it through?" I always say, "Keepthe faith." When someone says, "I'm broke; I have a lot of bills," I alwayssay, "Keep the faith." When my client's loved ones are sick, I always say,"Keep the faith." The old saying states that it's not over until God saysit's over. It's true. Being behind the chair doing what I love, I have had alot of faith. But I know I would have not made it without God. I reliedon God for everything. Sometimes we are tested in order to keep thefaith. We must meditate on the Word of God because He is still in themiracle-working business. Sometimes it takes blood, sweat, and tears to bethe person God wants us to be. I have belief and have faith and trust Godfor all things because God never fails.