The Beginning of Blogging

WHEN MY FIRST BOOK,FINDING the Balance, was published in 2011, I was introduced to blogging, and it ignited in me a desire and thirst for growth that to this day I continue to reach for. There is no end to learning or growth; evolvement is an eternal, sometimes challenging, but finally wonderful process, one that I look forward to continuing every day. Truly connecting with people on a soul level is probably one of the most beautiful experiences in life.

My first efforts at blogging were assisted by the publicity group involved with my first book's publication. They provided me with post titles for the first week of November 2011 and taught me how to create and showcase my finished work. Then it was time to go on my own and continue to create and discover new ideas.

It has been quite a learning experience, and what I found each week was that while I put pressure on myself to come up with a topic to write about, once I was able to, the writing flowed easily. I also discovered that just observing others in their daily lives provided me with a vast selection of topics. There is so much we can learn from others. While we are all unique individuals, the human and sometimes very emotional experience connects us in ways we may not always be aware of.

I think a lot of us can feel in some experiences that we are all alone. In some ways this is true, but not for the reason you may believe. We are alone in the way that the experience builds our individuality, as in "you are the only one who rises after you fall." Others can encourage you, but only you can choose to get back up.

I do hope that you enjoy my collection of blog posts. It was put together with a lot of love and devotion to inspire the belief in others that there is nothing you cannot do or change. If I want to encourage, inspire, and grow positive change, I must "be the change I wish to see in the world."

Slowly discovering and understanding the wisdom and insight within those who have inspired me has helped me to find my passion and purpose. I have found myself completely immersed in the desire to cultivate a world in which our souls connect more authentically; where people feel safe, loved, validated, and heard; and where kindness, empathy, respect, humility, and grace are not just definitions but meanings of life that we aspire to embody. I can think of no greater purpose in life.

First Blog Post

October 19, 2011

Who's the Adult Here?

I may be the parent of a special-needs child, but without her I might never have known or fulfilled my true potential. She has taught me so much about myself and has helped shape me into the person I am today. I am truly blessed to have her in my life and especially blessed to be her mother. When it comes to our children, we all want to help guide them, but with special-needs children, I believe they guide us.

My daughter guides me in little ways, like showing me that she will be ready to try or do something in a way that's better for her, in her own time. I think we all get caught up in the timelines of what's expected and try to apply these to our special-needs children; however, they have their own timelines, and they will remind us that we need to slow down and appreciate the journey. The phrase "everything in due time" captures that perfectly.

The most significant lessons I have learned because of my daughter are patience and tolerance. I can honestly say I had very little of either before she came into my life. I have learned to have a greater appreciation for the bigger picture. It's the little things that become the most significant as we progress through life.

I started to write for a couple of reasons. First, I needed to have a career that was better suited to the lifestyle needed when you have a special-needs child. These children require a significant amount of hands-on care, and it's best for them progress-wise if that care is provided by one of their pillars (parents are our biggest supports and strengths, so I refer to parents as pillars). Our children have the most success with progressing through life when their pillars are very present in the process. Second, I have always loved writing and have always written in a journal. Writing helps to alleviate the everyday things that happen in our lives. The phrase "getting things off your chest" describes exactly what writing does for me, and I wanted to encourage others to try that outlet and know they always had options through my book. I wanted to make a difference in this world, and what better way to do it than on a more global scale? Books reach many different people at various times in their lives.

I found that not only did my writing provide me with a stronger sense of inner peace but also a greater appreciation for my journey. This inner peace has given me an even stronger connection with my daughter, and the two of us have come to a form of contentment together.

October 26, 2011

Get It, Girl!

Just because you are a single mom doesn't mean you can't have everything you dream of. I use the law of attraction (LOA) in many areas of my life, and so far it has never let me down. Our thoughts are very powerful, and we can bring to our lives and the lives of our children everything that we need and desire.

I have always used a form of the LOA. There are a few different variations in definition, but the basis of it is visualizing and believing and remaining in a "state of being." I have always been very good at visualizing what I desire, and being able to visualize makes it that much easier to believe in it. Seeing is believing, and believing is seeing.

One example I can give you to illustrate the beautiful outcome that can be experienced from the LOA is my daughter. She was born three and a half months premature and weighed only one pound seven ounces. The doctors kept giving me the usual deadlines: the first twelve hours are critical, the next twenty-four hours are critical, and so on. I could see in my mind so clearly that she was going to make it and come home with me. She blew every doctor's warning out of the water; they were stunned but kept saying that my positive attitude would be very good for her. Of course it would. I knew that, and I would just smile to myself and say to them again, "She's coming home with me." They didn't realize that I had the ultimate secret in my pocket: the LOA.

I used the same concept in getting the job I wanted, getting the car I wanted, and writing my first book. I'm not done; more of my work will follow. You can have anything you want as long as you believe in yourself and your dreams.

You can find motivation in other single moms who may be on a different path, because we all have one thing in common: we work hard to make our children's lives all that they can be. There are so many times I could have just decided to give up and blame it on being a single mom or having a special-needs child. It's definitely a difficult journey, but we all deserve to have the life we desire.

Never stop chasing your dreams. Don't ever stop yourself because of a self-imposed limit — a belief that you can't do it or you're past the age of achieving. There is no such thing as too late. I believe you deserve it!

November 2, 2011

Time Out! Working Moms

Finding balance in today's world is a challenge, to say the least, but extremely necessary to a healthy lifestyle. Our health depends on our physical and mental well-being. If we don't feel good physically or mentally, our eternal light dims. It's important to take a time-out every once in a while to enhance your life. It's during these time-outs that we recharge ourselves and experience motivation, personal growth, and inspiration.

I've had a tough time of it myself this week. It's really important to include yourself in the list of people you have to take care of. How we feel on the inside reflects on the outside, and that directly affects the people in our lives. As much as I want to inspire positive thinking, sometimes I too get affected by negativity when it comes into my realm and find myself unnecessarily snapping at others. That is one of my biggest indicators that I need a time-out.

If you burn yourself out by not paying attention to your needs, you leave yourself wide open for negative energy to get in and wreak havoc. When we are well rested, we are strong, resilient, and powerful enough to ward off any negativity that could possibly come our way. Negativity, like everything else, travels in a cycle, and our own personal awareness is the beginning of its defeat.

It can be really difficult to find a little or a lot of time for yourself and whatever it is that provides you with what is needed to refuel and recharge your soul, but that's what you need to do. Because my life is so busy, I prefer anything that is quiet and peaceful and hopefully without interruption. Now this can be a tall order at times, but even a few moments can sometimes help. It's like that catnap when working a graveyard shift that gives you the extra boost needed to make it through.

If I could pick and choose, that's easy: a spa day for some real relaxation. Of course, that could get kind of pricey on a regular basis. So on a smaller scale, I could choose five to ten minutes of listening to a CD of the ocean or a waterfall or anything with nature. For me, that is what resonates balance and peace within. It's really important to listen to your inner voice. It won't lead you astray, and if it's telling you that you need to take a time-out, then take one.

For myself, I need more than five or ten minutes here and there, but if that's all you can accommodate to begin with, at least it's a start — an important start.

November 9, 2011

Dream Soup for the Soul

Your deepest desires and dreams are what feed your soul. Don't ever give up on trying to achieve something because of a self-imposed limitation or the limitations imposed by others. There is no shortage of desires, but there is a shortage of people with the determination to achieve them. The only one who can hold you back is you.

Every person out there who has achieved a dream always shares the same messages:

• Don't give up!

• If someone had told me a couple of years ago that I would be here, I would have never believed it.

My theory is that it's half fear (not believing in ourselves) and half lack of faith (not believing in the higher power of the universe) that keeps us from trying. Everything we do ties into the law of attraction (LOA); we are always operating in that state of being. The question is whether you want to make it work for you or against you.

When we are fearful of the prospect of change or failing, this will have the LOA operating against us, because what you are giving your greatest energy to will increase. When we are faithful to our heart's desires and positive thoughts are abundant, then the LOA operates with us and increases that energy.

My biggest moments of fear have also been my greatest moments of positive change — change that has taken me into a much more beneficial area of life than I could have ever predicted or imagined. Every time something great has happened for me, it has been because I have let go of the reins and believed. It's difficult to do and sometimes scary, but I can honestly say I have never been disappointed, and I'm always happily surprised. It actually takes more energy to resist than to go along with destiny.

Everything always works out as it is supposed to. Why make it difficult for yourself along the way? I could have easily given up so many times and blamed circumstance, timing, etc., but my will (maybe I mean stubbornness) is far stronger than my fear.

I fully believe that we all can do anything we need to or desire to, against the odds and the obstacles that others (or we ourselves) may throw at us. We all have a strength within us to achieve. Just tap into it. Don't let anyone ever discourage you, and don't accept anything less than you deserve.

Truly believe in yourself! You won't be disappointed.

November 17, 2011

We're All Human

Respect and Forgiveness for Yourself First

We all have many challenges and tests throughout our lives. Some are much harder than others, and when we are in the middle of the harder lessons, it can sometimes be really difficult to find the light at the end of the tunnel. Once you finally come through it, though, it's important to recognize and honor how much you have learned and progressed. Have gratitude for the strength to make it through and all that you've learned about yourself along the way.

I always find that at the beginning of something difficult, I try to find answers and solutions. It's hard for me to have patience, and it challenges my faith in my own belief that everything happens for a reason.

Whether you're successful or not depends on how you view it. Everything does happen for a reason, and success or failure could be exactly that reason. I find that the expectations I have for myself are so high that I don't allow myself any room for error, and when I fail I am very hard on myself.

So it's very likely that when I experience failure, that is the lesson: to allow myself to make mistakes and handle them with integrity, and to know that no one is perfect, so why should I expect perfection from myself 100 percent of the time? The understanding of each lesson comes when I am ready to accept it for the greater purpose it serves.

It's so important to acknowledge where you've come from, how you got there, and the person you have become along the way. When we hold on to resentment or anger, ultimately we are hurting ourselves, not the people we have these feelings toward, and what we are really holding on to is the hurt. In forgiving yourself, you're allowing yourself to move on and away from the terrible feelings. You're allowing yourself to no longer hurt and to move forward to a happier life.

It's such a hard thing to do, but I can assure you, you can't even imagine how much better life will be when you do. Make the shift, forgive, and move on to happiness. The law of attraction will increase that state of being.

November 22, 2011

The Aha Moment

Peace + Balance = Contentment

It took me so long to get to the point of contentment, peace, and balance — not because it was something that takes a long period of time to achieve but because it takes letting go and allowing those aha moments to shine through. It's amazing how, when you follow the path of least resistance, doors open to what your life should be.

Everyone has had those aha moments, and I personally love them. I wish every day contained one, because I always feel so elated internally when it happens. It was one of those aha moments that sparked me to write my book. All of the pieces of the puzzle came together in that very moment, and it was exhilarating.

What follows those moments is peace, balance, and ultimately contentment, because you've solved one of your own life mysteries. Of course, there are many more to come along your life path. Contentment comes in many different forms, but I believe that it's all about connecting. When you connect with others on a soul level, they can inspire you in ways you didn't know were possible.

Contentment, for me, came from letting go of things I thought were important and trimming back to the basics. In today's busy material world, we become so enmeshed with all these things that we think we need but really only clutter our minds, our life, and ultimately our contentment. I'm not saying have nothing. I'm saying have what brings you contentment.

When I am in a state of contentment, I find that I have gratitude and appreciation for all that surrounds me. Everything is beautiful and wonderful. I strive to make contentment a permanent fixture within my emotional psyche, not just because it feels great for me but also because it feels great for everyone around me. When we project contentment from the inside outward, we are spreading happiness to everyone we come into contact with. Now this is an emotional state of being worth having.

My favorite quote that I always strive to meet is one of the "states of being" that provide me with contentment:

To Laugh often and much; To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

November 29, 2011

Who's Got Your Back?

Quality Friends Are Priceless

It can be so difficult to maintain the energy needed to deflect negativity if you have to deal with such behaviors on a daily basis — or on any basis. When negativity comes into our space, it doesn't just thrust the negativity at us; sometimes it takes up residence for a day or two within us. It's hard to determine how it's going to affect us; that depends on our current disposition. If we are stressed or overwhelmed, we are in a vulnerable position.