The Bouncer: 1 (Joe the Bouncer) - Tapa dura

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David Gordon holds an MA in English and Comparative Literature and an MFA in Writing, both from Columbia University, and has worked in film, fashion, publishing and pornography. He is the author of The Serialist, which won the VCU/Cabell First Novel Award and was a finalist for an Edgar Award, and Mystery Girl, as well as a short story collection, White Tiger on Snow Mountain. His work has appeared in the Paris Review, the New York Times, and the Los Angeles Review of Books, among other publications. He was born and lives in New York City.

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Joe looked up, sort of smiling mildly, and folded the page of his book. Then he saw where Crystal was pointing. The giant was wading through the crowd, apparently hauling Kim off to his lair to eat later. Moving easy, Joe stepped right into his path.

“Hey! You! Meat!” he yelled. “Over here.”

The giant made a frowny face, focusing on Joe like a bull seeing a red flag. “Don’t call me that.”

Joe grinned. “How about I give you a lap dance?”

Grumbling, the giant tossed Kim to the side, and she crashed onto a table of Asian tourists. Then he made for Joe. Crystal felt a little bad and braced herself to see that pretty face get ugly. The giant hauled off and threw a punch, his fist coming down like a sledgehammer. But Joe dipped gracefully and, riding on the balls of his feet, stepped safely inside his swing. He kicked out, knocking the giant’s shin from under him. As he stumbled, Joe reached in to grab a point on his thick neck.

“Ow!” Like a wounded monster, the giant howled in pain and tried to shake loose, but Joe just pinched harder.

“Easy, easy, let’s walk,” he said, leading the bent giant along, groaning and moaning. The crowd parted and they went right out the door.

Kimberly got up, slowly, with the help of the tourists.

“Wow,” she said to Crystal. “Now that’s a good bouncer.”