Living a Life I Love, Second Edition: Healing sexual compulsivity, sexual addiction, sexual avoidance and other sexual concerns. - Tapa blanda

What would a life you love look like in the realm of sexuality? For many people, delving into the realm of sexuality is very painful. Due to the nature of the healing process, however, we need to confront this pain in order to work through it. In addition to pain, addressing sexual issues often stirs up shame, fear, and embarrassment. This is completely normal; if you experience these emotions it’s a good sign that you’re moving in the right direction! All of these painful emotions – shame, guilt, fear, embarrassment – are the consequences of repressed sexual energy. By acknowledging and accepting your sexuality—and being gentle with yourself—you can learn to express this energy in healthy ways. If you’re reading this, certain sexual behaviors are probably interfering with your life and/or the life of someone you care about. In order to prevent more damage from being done as you work through this treatment process, you need to stop any immediately problematic behaviors now. In addition to stopping immediately problematic behaviors, the longer-term goals include developing and learning to maintain healthy sexual behaviors. In order to accomplish this, you’ll need a solid understanding of the concepts and terms involved in sexual health. In Part One, I introduce concepts and definitions that are both necessary and useful to understand as you move through the treatment process that is presented in Part Two. For example, you’ll learn about the ten components of sexual health—a list of topics around which the workbook is structured. As you contemplate the material, you’ll begin to make connections between these concepts and your own life. I have provided several prompt assignments to assist you with this. Identifying, exploring, and addressing the way these concepts apply to your life is the essence of Part Two. In Part Two you’ll apply the concepts learned in Part One to your own experiences. This part of the book is presented in three stages – Problem Identification, Primary Treatment, and Groundwork for Completing Treatment. In Stage One: Problem Identification you’ll examine your own sexual behaviors through a series of assignments, pinpointing and ultimately prioritizing problem areas in order to build a personalized structure for treatment. In Stage Two: Primary Treatment, you’ll work to address the issues identified in Stage One. The topics in this stage reflect the ten components of sexual health discussed during Part One. This second stage is where you’ll learn to stop unhealthy patterns and build healthy ones to replace them. Through a variety of carefully selected assignments, you’ll examine the behaviors, thoughts, values and circumstances that define your life. In Stage Three: Groundwork for Completing Treatment you’ll review what you did and learned in the first two stages, using this information to develop a Continuing Care Plan to serve as a guide for you to reference and revise as you work toward living a life you love. The Personal Definition of Sexual Health is the roadmap in your journey toward this life. It is the tool you’ll take with you as you continue past the assignments of this book.

Weston Edwards is a psychologist specializing in sexual health, substance use, and mental health. He is the Director of Program Development supervising the sexual health programming at a residential substance use facility that helps clients address the link between sexuality and substance use issues. He is also the Clinical Director an outpatient Mental Health program in Minneapolis. Weston completed his PHD in counseling psychology from the University of Minnesota. His professional website is sexualhealthinstitute.org. He provides life coaching services at livingalifeilovecoaching.com. His other books are available at livingalifeilovebooks.com