Judge Offerheimer's First Case (Classic Reprint) - Tapa blanda

Excerpt from Judge Offerheimer's First Case

Judge. Some odder day. Ve vill now listen vile de liar (lawyer) for der Plaintiff speaks his argument.

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This book is a reproduction of an important historical work. Forgotten Books uses state-of-the-art technology to digitally reconstruct the work, preserving the original format whilst repairing imperfections present in the aged copy. In rare cases, an imperfection in the original, such as a blemish or missing page, may be replicated in our edition. We do, however, repair the vast majority of imperfections successfully; any imperfections that remain are intentionally left to preserve the state of such historical works.

Excerpt from Judge Offerheimer's First Case

Scene. - Court-room - Judge seated up C. of stage behind a desk or table, on which are law books and documents - on the R. of the Judge are seated Mr. Wickpick, Mr. Scallops and Mr. Sprout - on the L. of the Judge are seated Mrs. Bodwell, Mr. Mix, Mr. Sperry and Mr. Baldwin - the witness chair L. of the Judge.

Note. - The witnesses may be seated upon the stage or come in when called - when addressing the court witness should rise.

Sprout. (rising) Oh yez! Oh yez! the court of - is open for business.

Judge. Vat vas der first case in the court house?

Baldwin. Bodwell and Wickpick.

Judge. Bodvell on a picknic?

Baldwin. Bodwell versus Wickpick.

Judge. Oh! Bodvell's first picknic! Did he done someding on der picknic?

Baldwin. No, your honor, it is Bodwell v.s. Wickpick.

Judge. Oh! I see. I have got an impediment in my ears and I didn't don't hear very vell. Is V. S. Wickpick his full maiden name, or vas he a she or a human being, or not?

Baldwin. Mr. Wickpick has been stealing the affections of Mrs. Bodwell.

Judge. Oh! been stealing confectionary from Mrs. Bodvell? How much did he take?

Baldwin. No, No! he has been alienating Mrs. Bodwell's love?

Judge. Oh! eliminating her love? He fell in love mither and den fell oud again. Vell, how much is he going to charge her?

Baldwin. She is the one that is prosecuting him.

Judge. Oh! she vas prosecuting him! dot's der color of another horse, Vell, vat does she vant done? Hang him or marry him, or vill money heal der elimination business?

Baldwin. She brings a breach of promise suit.

Judge. She brings some breeches, and promises him a suit. Vell, he ought to be satisfied.

Baldwin. You don't understand. She sues him for ten thousand dollars and alimony.

Judge. Ten dousand dollars und some amonia.

About the Publisher

Forgotten Books publishes hundreds of thousands of rare and classic books. Find more at www.forgottenbooks.com

This book is a reproduction of an important historical work. Forgotten Books uses state-of-the-art technology to digitally reconstruct the work, preserving the original format whilst repairing imperfections present in the aged copy. In rare cases, an imperfection in the original, such as a blemish or missing page, may be replicated in our edition. We do, however, repair the vast majority of imperfections successfully; any imperfections that remain are intentionally left to preserve the state of such historical works.