You Might Be an Alcoholic... - Tapa blanda

Many years ago I was enjoying a few cold ones with some friends, when suddenly a party foul occurred, and I blurted out, “You know, if you...., you might be an alcoholic!” to one of my friends. Of course we’re still trying to remember which one of these was the first quote, but unfortunately the specifics of all the good times sometimes drown in the flood of fluids. But from that point forward, I always had a pen and notepad with me to jot down all the new quotes as they occurred, and they were everywhere to be had, especially in those college days. So now it's time to call you and your friends out, who might be an alcoholic : "If you're old enough to legally purchase alcohol, but still wet the bed occasionally" "If on more than one occasion, you've walked out of your house to get in your car, only to realize you left it at the bar the previous night" "If the only time you've ever voted in the town's election was when there was a proposed bill to allow liquor by the drink" "If you have a bottle opener on your key chain" "If your dining room table is used more often to play drinking games than for eating" "If you've ever slid past your friends in a bar to obtain a drink before having to converse" ....YOU might be an alcoholic!