This historic book may have numerous typos and missing text. Purchasers can download a free scanned copy of the original book (without typos) from the publisher. Not indexed. Not illustrated. 1906 Excerpt: ..."Will you do it again?" And he cheerfully answered her "Nomb." If you're looking for a wife, come to Boston; If you're single, wish to trade, or have divorced one, You will find one there, no doubt, For they're lying all about, Like Whitcomb Riley pumpkins with the frost on. There was a young fellow from Lansing, Who was very devoted to dancing; He waltzed a girl once, She called him a dunce, Because on her toes he kept prancing. In a village post-office, Miss Peek Had a job at six plunks per week, But she near had a fit, And threatened to quit, When a postal came written in Greek. A bookworm of Kennebunk, Me., Found pleasure in reading Monte., He also liked Poe, And Daniel Defoe, But the telephone book caused him pe. A maiden of Chattanooga, Tenn., Whose name was Miss Bridget D. Henn, Was afloat on the tide, When she soulf ully side, "I w'd like t' have wan iv thim Menn," The centipede was happy until the toad, in fun, Asked her, "Which leg comes after which?" This worked her mind to such a pitch, She lay distracted in a ditch, Considering how to run. There was a young man from St. Cloud, Who played the trombone out aloud, He was hit by a brick, At the very first lick, But he thanked his detractors and boud. A man who was deeply in debt, Said, "No matter whatever I gebt, My creditors claim A share of the same, Which makes me discouraged, you bebt." Said a dainty professor of Latin, Who dressed his pet piggie in satin: "If I teach her to speak In Norwegian and Greek, Do you think she'd be easier to fatten?" An ancient New Yorker named Pratt, Once went on a terrible batt. Whomever he saw, He would paste with his paw, And gleefully gurgle, "Take thatt." What a fool a man in love can be!--Ev...
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